Monday, February 9, 2015
November 2014 Video
Here is a video I took when we first arrived of the children in the dining hall. They sing two songs, Lord I Lift Your Name Up High and Soon and Very Soon.
The leader of the singing is Sarah and Mary Clare taught the children the movements to the first song. Only God Knows and Samuel are not present in this video, and the babies of course who came later in the year. xo
Saturday, February 7, 2015
Poppa Tom aka "The Chief"
Thanks to all for your love, support and prayers. Every time I look at my watch, I find myself adding five hours and imagining what the children are doing. They must be in chapel now for night prayer (8pm) and then getting ready for bed.
We are back in the US but we left a large part of our hearts in Ghana.
May God bless us all.
Pictures from Christmas Day
The following are pictures from Christmas morning after church. What a beautiful and joyful day it was!!
This is Rejoice, all decked out in her specks, new earrings, new outfit and a wig to boot!! Rejoice came to the orphanage just a few weeks before we got there and learned to walk and talk the past few months.
This is John. He is a charmer!! John has some missing fingers from his right hand and some webbed fingers on his left and with lots of encouragement, he can talk pretty well. He is full of hugs and laughter. He currently has a rash on most of his body that no one seems able to diagnose correctly and cure. He has had a very difficult time trying not to scratch, but is mostly in a happy mood despite his ailment.
This is Julie holding Lucy, also called Chumba. Julie is about 13 years old and is of monumental help each day with the kids. She has a patience beyond her years and has never had a grumbly attitude that I have seen. She is a true angel!! Chumba is decked out in new clothes and hair extensions!! She has the cutest voice and an even cuter laugh. Lucy was extremely malnourished before coming to the orphanage and has grown into a healthy, happy girl!
Here is Peter, all smiles today!! Peter has cerebral palsy and has a difficult time speaking and walking, although he gives both 100% effort. He loves the attention of working one on one with learning and physical therapy.
Here is Samuel with the head full of specks with David and in the background is Emmanuel and Matina. Samuel is currently in secondary school and has a mind that is always working and asking questions. David has only one full arm, as you can see, but never does he let that be an impediment to doing anything. He is a happy and very active boy!!
This is Elizabeth, all smiles and happiness on Christmas!! Elizabeth recently had surgery on her foot and is hopefully resting right now so it can heal properly! Elizabeth is totally in love with all the babies and is a great helper with them!
Here is Alice in the orange dress, Sister Stan's #1 helper who knows where everyone and everything is all the time. She is a wonder! Also in this picture is Sarah, Gabriel and Matina in front, and standing next to Alice is Fr. Isadore's niece, but her name escapes me at the moment.
Here is Sister Stan's nephew, Prince, who works at the orphanage and is probably the most calm and patient person I have ever met in my entire life!! He is with God Knows, who has the megawatt smile!!
A joyful day, joyful smiles on the most joyful day of the year... the birth of our Lord... Alleluia! xo
Friday, February 6, 2015
Pictures and Posts
Here I am with Emmanuella... she is a little unhappy because I was in the middle of feeding her at the time and she hates to be burped!! But, as unladylike as she thinks it is, she always seems to feel better after the dainty belches she gives.
Here is Mary Clare with a group of kids in the evening. The kids absolutely loved Mama Mary, the stories she told them and the games she played with them.
Here is a Christmas morning picture of the children. They have on their new Christmas clothes and "specs", as they call them. What a joyful and happy day it was, with pancakes in the morning, peanut butter cookies and lots of dancing and toffees!! (toffee=candy)
I am sorry to say I do not have a photo yet of the Chief with his tribe. Hopefully my blogging counterpart can supply some. He really was there... I promise!!
Despite the distance that separates us. my heart remains with these children, and probably always will. They certainly are living saints... love them so much!! xoxo
Thursday, February 5, 2015
My Difficult Decision
I think it is very difficult to discern the will of God in our lives. Despite the ease of the word used, "the CALL of the Lord," it is nothing as easy as the word "call" suggests. When we hear the word call, we may think of a phone... and the easy communication it provides, or we may think of a person yelling. There is a sort of funny anecdote that most sitcoms have used over the years, probably funny because most of us have experienced it at one time or another. The mother is in the kitchen preparing dinner and a child comes in. The mother says, "please call everyone for dinner", and the child opens his mouth and calls out as loud as possible, "DINNER'S READY!!!!!" At that, the mom rolls her eyes and says, "well, I could have done that!!" Even Mary and Joseph come to my mind now. Certainly their calling was anything but easy, but the way in which they received their call, through an angel, well... it sort of eliminates the need for discernment!!
The modern day call of God to the vocation He wills for each of us is much more subtle, and usually requires a close and familiar relationship with God. Whether you want to believe it or not, God has a plan for each of us, His will for our lives. You may say you do whatever you want or that you just "go with the flow," but who do you think is giving you the inspiration to do what you are doing, or directing the flow? He who has created us desires for us joy and happiness beyond all knowing, perhaps not in this life, but most certainly in the next. His will for our lives directs us to that place. I yearn for that happiness and joy, particularly now, and especially for the residents of The Nazareth Home for God's Children and children like them all over the world. I believe it is God's will for my life to help love and care for children such as these, wherever they may be.
When I decided to go to Sang Village and the orphanage, I believed with all my heart that is where God wanted me to be, and I still believe that with 100% certainty. However, never being a missionary before, I was unaware of the stress, heartache, pain and sorrow involved in giving of myself so entirely, and its affect on my body and soul. Believe me there is happiness and laughter there too, but the overwhelming sadness is consuming and unrelenting. The multiple crises we faced daily, the heat and dust, the soul-searing sorrow of the rejection of children, the culture change and constant sicknesses all worked against me until I felt defeated.
Well, I am not defeated, but I am taking a time out... time away. I truly believe that I have bitten off more than I could chew, so to speak, in deciding to be a first-time missionary without an on-site support team for a year. So, I am leaving the Nazareth Home for God's Children physically, but my heart will always be there, and I go with Sister Stan's blessing and know the door to the orphanage will always be open to me.
I believe the will of God in my life is to care for His poor children, to raise awareness of the sorrow and dehumanization poverty causes and to give with an open heart all the love inside me, all the blessings I have received and all the knowledge of my Savior I can pack into my meager brain.
There may have been some static on the line when I received my "call," I heard 12 months, but God was saying 12 weeks!! But rest assured that my desire to help and love poor children in so much need is stronger than ever, and as soon as I am at the same point physically and spiritually, I hope to head once more into the deep.
I am grateful for all the support we have received from everyone, be it prayers, money or supplies. The Nazareth Home for God's Children is blessed indeed to have so much love coming from such generous friends. Truly, I cannot express all the thanks I feel in my heart... it is overflowing! I am also grateful for all the readers of this blog, and will be posting pictures and videos over the coming days when I return to Buffalo.
I am sad to leave the children at the orphanage, and am sorry about committing to something I had no idea I would not be able to completely give, but I know this is the right decision for me at the present time, and I look forward to returning to the missionary life when my body and soul permit it, God willing.
By the way, Mary Clare has returned to Buffalo as well. Her strength, courage and loving care has been nothing short of amazing, and I am so grateful to have been able to share this experience with her. I know whatever Mary Clare decides to do with her life, where ever God is calling her, she will give 100% of herself with her patient and loving ways. The children at The Nazareth Home for God's Children have been so blessed to have been loved and cared for by such an angel!! xo
The modern day call of God to the vocation He wills for each of us is much more subtle, and usually requires a close and familiar relationship with God. Whether you want to believe it or not, God has a plan for each of us, His will for our lives. You may say you do whatever you want or that you just "go with the flow," but who do you think is giving you the inspiration to do what you are doing, or directing the flow? He who has created us desires for us joy and happiness beyond all knowing, perhaps not in this life, but most certainly in the next. His will for our lives directs us to that place. I yearn for that happiness and joy, particularly now, and especially for the residents of The Nazareth Home for God's Children and children like them all over the world. I believe it is God's will for my life to help love and care for children such as these, wherever they may be.
When I decided to go to Sang Village and the orphanage, I believed with all my heart that is where God wanted me to be, and I still believe that with 100% certainty. However, never being a missionary before, I was unaware of the stress, heartache, pain and sorrow involved in giving of myself so entirely, and its affect on my body and soul. Believe me there is happiness and laughter there too, but the overwhelming sadness is consuming and unrelenting. The multiple crises we faced daily, the heat and dust, the soul-searing sorrow of the rejection of children, the culture change and constant sicknesses all worked against me until I felt defeated.
Well, I am not defeated, but I am taking a time out... time away. I truly believe that I have bitten off more than I could chew, so to speak, in deciding to be a first-time missionary without an on-site support team for a year. So, I am leaving the Nazareth Home for God's Children physically, but my heart will always be there, and I go with Sister Stan's blessing and know the door to the orphanage will always be open to me.
I believe the will of God in my life is to care for His poor children, to raise awareness of the sorrow and dehumanization poverty causes and to give with an open heart all the love inside me, all the blessings I have received and all the knowledge of my Savior I can pack into my meager brain.
There may have been some static on the line when I received my "call," I heard 12 months, but God was saying 12 weeks!! But rest assured that my desire to help and love poor children in so much need is stronger than ever, and as soon as I am at the same point physically and spiritually, I hope to head once more into the deep.
I am grateful for all the support we have received from everyone, be it prayers, money or supplies. The Nazareth Home for God's Children is blessed indeed to have so much love coming from such generous friends. Truly, I cannot express all the thanks I feel in my heart... it is overflowing! I am also grateful for all the readers of this blog, and will be posting pictures and videos over the coming days when I return to Buffalo.
I am sad to leave the children at the orphanage, and am sorry about committing to something I had no idea I would not be able to completely give, but I know this is the right decision for me at the present time, and I look forward to returning to the missionary life when my body and soul permit it, God willing.
By the way, Mary Clare has returned to Buffalo as well. Her strength, courage and loving care has been nothing short of amazing, and I am so grateful to have been able to share this experience with her. I know whatever Mary Clare decides to do with her life, where ever God is calling her, she will give 100% of herself with her patient and loving ways. The children at The Nazareth Home for God's Children have been so blessed to have been loved and cared for by such an angel!! xo
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
Sorrow and Woes
Sometimes it feels like an overwhelming force is ever on our shoulders here, like one more thing that goes wrong will break us all. Sometimes it feels like too much pain and heartache is here, too much for the average human being to bear, and believe me, if I am not average, I am somewhere in the below average range. Things like...
...water crisis again today, no water in Sang, no water here at the house, no water at the old
house, no rain expected for 4 months. Solution: Order a water tanker from Yendi to come
and deliver water, for a price so high it hurts, literally, and is undrinkable even with water
filters.
...Ella is having problems eating. She coughs while drinking her bottle and formula is coming
up out of her nose. Could be a cleft palate, could be a problem with her esophagus, or any other
number of difficult problems to solve here in Africa. It is stressful for both of us whenever she
eats. My heart aches that she has to undergo any other issues in her life besides the rejection
and abandonment of her family. Why does she need more to bear? Who can help her here?? I
found myself tearing up more than a few times today thinking about the possible woes facing this child yet again. It is unfair.
...We have a new child, Paul, who is a tank of a boy. He is the healthiest baby I have met yet,
with chubby cheeks and chins and arms and legs. He is adorable, but unwanted because his
mother died and no one wants to assume responsibility for this big bundle of joy. Yet another
child having to grow up without his family, with the mark of rejection.
...Kids getting sick, falling from seizures and hurting themselves, kids being kids and playing
rough, kids needing attention all at the same time. Not so terrible until you realize there are
40 of these children, 4 of which are babies in need of constant care, several who are non-
verbal, a few who like to hide/run away, a couple who just like to hit every one, and you've
got yourself in the middle of a never ending hurricane of noise and needs.
...Construction always being done behind, in front of and in the house. Building is going on all
the time, which I am happy about for Sister. But the workers leave nails, saws, hammers,
power tools around ALL. THE. TIME. And it does not matter how many times they are
asked to pick up dropped nails or not to leave the saws laying around, they do it anyways.
Then, I get to scold two children who are sword fighting with saws or someone who is
drawing on the car with a nail. Just what I need, another reason to punish the kids. Ugh.
It is not easy here. It is not a vacation. The list of stresses seems unending, it certainly is longer that the examples I have given above. And I guess I am back in this spot because I am seeing it all again through Tom and Paula's eyes. I think you kind of get lost in the hurricane so deeply that it all becomes your new normal, when, hello... "normal" this life definitely isn't. Sometimes I think I paint too pretty a picture of our life here. Don't get me wrong, it is beautiful here, but heart wrenching as well. It is hard. No one ever told me it would be easy, and I wasn't expecting it to be, but it is harder than I ever expected. And it is more painful than I could have possibly expected it to be. I feel drained of energy and spirit so often, and it is not always possible to get filled up again when needed.
It makes me feel lost. xo
...water crisis again today, no water in Sang, no water here at the house, no water at the old
house, no rain expected for 4 months. Solution: Order a water tanker from Yendi to come
and deliver water, for a price so high it hurts, literally, and is undrinkable even with water
filters.
...Ella is having problems eating. She coughs while drinking her bottle and formula is coming
up out of her nose. Could be a cleft palate, could be a problem with her esophagus, or any other
number of difficult problems to solve here in Africa. It is stressful for both of us whenever she
eats. My heart aches that she has to undergo any other issues in her life besides the rejection
and abandonment of her family. Why does she need more to bear? Who can help her here?? I
found myself tearing up more than a few times today thinking about the possible woes facing this child yet again. It is unfair.
...We have a new child, Paul, who is a tank of a boy. He is the healthiest baby I have met yet,
with chubby cheeks and chins and arms and legs. He is adorable, but unwanted because his
mother died and no one wants to assume responsibility for this big bundle of joy. Yet another
child having to grow up without his family, with the mark of rejection.
...Kids getting sick, falling from seizures and hurting themselves, kids being kids and playing
rough, kids needing attention all at the same time. Not so terrible until you realize there are
40 of these children, 4 of which are babies in need of constant care, several who are non-
verbal, a few who like to hide/run away, a couple who just like to hit every one, and you've
got yourself in the middle of a never ending hurricane of noise and needs.
...Construction always being done behind, in front of and in the house. Building is going on all
the time, which I am happy about for Sister. But the workers leave nails, saws, hammers,
power tools around ALL. THE. TIME. And it does not matter how many times they are
asked to pick up dropped nails or not to leave the saws laying around, they do it anyways.
Then, I get to scold two children who are sword fighting with saws or someone who is
drawing on the car with a nail. Just what I need, another reason to punish the kids. Ugh.
It is not easy here. It is not a vacation. The list of stresses seems unending, it certainly is longer that the examples I have given above. And I guess I am back in this spot because I am seeing it all again through Tom and Paula's eyes. I think you kind of get lost in the hurricane so deeply that it all becomes your new normal, when, hello... "normal" this life definitely isn't. Sometimes I think I paint too pretty a picture of our life here. Don't get me wrong, it is beautiful here, but heart wrenching as well. It is hard. No one ever told me it would be easy, and I wasn't expecting it to be, but it is harder than I ever expected. And it is more painful than I could have possibly expected it to be. I feel drained of energy and spirit so often, and it is not always possible to get filled up again when needed.
It makes me feel lost. xo
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