Tomorrow, December 31st, is my birthday. The story goes that I was due to be born sometime in the middle of January, but because of my mom's high sugar, the doctor decided he better induce labor and asked my parents when they would want to do it. My father, being an accountant of course, chose before the end of 1971 for the tax exemption, and so the rest, as they say, is history.
I never really minded having a birthday that the entire world celebrated, and you get a lot of funny comments when people hear your birthday is on New Year's Eve. My grandmother's birthday is on New Year's Day, so we often celebrate our birthdays together, a great honor for me. She will be 98 years old on January 1, 2015, and will, I am sure, celebrate with a Manhattan... Cheers to you, GGB...I love you!!
This year I am not sure that anyone here besides Mary Clare knows it is my birthday tomorrow, and that is just fine with me!! I have had many, many "all about me" birthdays... this year is different. Tomorrow I will visit Mary in the hospital, who is there under observation to see if she is receiving the right seizure medication, I will also feed hungry children, take care of Ella, who now has a cold on top of everything else, I will teach the older children about Reconciliation and read books to the younger children. Tomorrow I will play at being a physical therapist and choir director... so many things I do here are things I have never in my life imagined I would do. I have way stepped out of my comfort zone and into what sometimes feels like the twilight zone, but really is the God zone. It is the zone of putting my fears, cares, concerns, pleasures, wants and sometimes needs last. It is doing things I could never see myself doing before, and doing them with joy. It is facing my fears with faith and trusting in myself, in who my family helped to create me to be.
I will not be receiving any presents on my birthday this year, which is again just fine with me. But I was wondering if maybe the viewers of this page could give me a gift this year. I am told that I have had 30,000 visitors to my blog... that may be small potatoes in cyberspace, but in Sarah's space, that is unbelievable!!! If everyone who reads this blog would do one thing over the next couple of days that is outside of their "comfort zone" or something that puts others first, that would be an awesome gift!!! Maybe visiting someone in the hospital or working at a soup kitchen one day. Maybe spending time with an elderly neighbor or taking clothes and books to someone in need. If you could do one thing that takes you out of your normal busyness and make time for someone in need, maybe even someone in need of forgiveness or a little extra love and understanding, and 30,000 of you did it, that would be quite an amazing, one of a kind, extra special birthday gift to me... really to God, and since God created me, every inch, He should be the one to receive the gift anyways!!
I give thanks to my parents and 43 (!!!!!!!) years of love and support, to my grandparents who could probably be in the running for world's greatest grandparents ever, to my brothers and sisters who lift me up each day and help me to continue my work, to my nieces and nephews who I love more than they could ever know, to my best friend who has always been there for me, to too many people to count who have supported me and loved me for all of these years. I love you all... I will say a prayer of thanksgiving for all of you tomorrow.
I wish you all a very Happy New Year... be safe and have fun!! I wish you all the best things in 2015 and invite you to keep up with me throughout the year as I continue to grow and learn about what it really means to give and to receive. Love to all... xo
Tuesday, December 30, 2014
Sunday, December 28, 2014
Emmanuella
Emanuella, or Ella for short, is our Christmas baby here at the Nazareth Home for God's Children. Although chronologically 6 months old, because of malnutrition and lack of proper care, she appears to be about 2 months old. She has a big head in proportion to the rest of her little body, the biggest chocolate brown eyes I have ever seen and a tiny little mouth from which the teeniest cries come out. Her body is literally skin and bones and she is so flexible, sometimes when I am trying to burp her over my shoulder, she brings her legs up behind her to almost form a circle!
Ella is a super smart baby. She picks things up quickly. On the way to the hospital with the mother, she wouldn't take the bottle of formula at all, even though her mother had no milk for her and it had probably been a while since she had eaten last. After her first night here, she started holding the bottle with her tiny little hands and she uses signs to signal her desire for food. We change the babies in one room usually that has all the diaper changing supplies. Well, poor little Ella has a diaper rash and it hurts her when I clean her up. Now, after just a matter of days, she cries when we enter that room. You can see in her eyes that she is always learning, and in her short little life so far, she hasn't learned the best things.
Ella doesn't trust anyone. She hasn't smiled yet, or cooed or made cute, happy gurgling sounds babies make. She has learned that people cannot be counted on. She does not like to be held and won't even drift off to sleep if you rock her. She likes her bottle best lying on a pillow, not in anyone's arms, and her eyes are always watchful, waiting... for what, I don't know.
She sleeps in my room and I am her primary care taker. She is beginning to know me, I think, and will sometimes sit in my arms for a few minutes before crying to be laid down. She wakes up a lot at night, sometimes just to drink an ounce of two of milk, maybe just to be sure there is milk to drink. I started slowly massaging her, tickling my fingertips up her arms and legs. She gets really still and just absorbs the sensation, but makes no outward show of emotion. She hates taking a bath and cries all the way through it. And, unfortunately, has a runny stomach to boot. Poor lady.
I sing to her and whisper in her ear. I look into her eyes for long minutes, hoping to see the beginnings of a smile there. I try to hold her as much as I can so she will get used to the sensation of being loved and will soon trust enough to allow herself the joy of that. The children here love her, especially the toddlers... all running up to give her kisses and snuggle their noses into her neck. She definitely has a lot of love showered on her all day long. After one of the Christmas dance competitions, I suggested the next competition should be who can make Ella smile.
Last night she began playing with my fingers holding her bottle for her and this morning as I was getting ready for my day, she was following me around the room with her watchful eyes, and she was just beginning to coo in a singsong way. It was super cute, but I didn't stop to look at her because I was afraid she would stop. I just let the music of her cute tiny voice fill my mind and heart and said a prayer that she would unlearn her past soon so she can be filled with the joy of babyhood.
And for the first time since being here, I thought, how in the world am I ever going to leave her? I know detachment is probably the best way to go in situations like this. Take care of the children and see to their needs, but do not allow yourself to become attached to them. I think I probably lost that battle the day she arrived when I was in the backseat of the car with her mother and uncle and she just crept into my heart without my knowledge or permission.
I will keep you updated on baby Ella, and her physical and emotional progress. I just hope she learns quickly that there will be milk for her at night... so I can get some sleep!! xo
Ella is a super smart baby. She picks things up quickly. On the way to the hospital with the mother, she wouldn't take the bottle of formula at all, even though her mother had no milk for her and it had probably been a while since she had eaten last. After her first night here, she started holding the bottle with her tiny little hands and she uses signs to signal her desire for food. We change the babies in one room usually that has all the diaper changing supplies. Well, poor little Ella has a diaper rash and it hurts her when I clean her up. Now, after just a matter of days, she cries when we enter that room. You can see in her eyes that she is always learning, and in her short little life so far, she hasn't learned the best things.
Ella doesn't trust anyone. She hasn't smiled yet, or cooed or made cute, happy gurgling sounds babies make. She has learned that people cannot be counted on. She does not like to be held and won't even drift off to sleep if you rock her. She likes her bottle best lying on a pillow, not in anyone's arms, and her eyes are always watchful, waiting... for what, I don't know.
She sleeps in my room and I am her primary care taker. She is beginning to know me, I think, and will sometimes sit in my arms for a few minutes before crying to be laid down. She wakes up a lot at night, sometimes just to drink an ounce of two of milk, maybe just to be sure there is milk to drink. I started slowly massaging her, tickling my fingertips up her arms and legs. She gets really still and just absorbs the sensation, but makes no outward show of emotion. She hates taking a bath and cries all the way through it. And, unfortunately, has a runny stomach to boot. Poor lady.
I sing to her and whisper in her ear. I look into her eyes for long minutes, hoping to see the beginnings of a smile there. I try to hold her as much as I can so she will get used to the sensation of being loved and will soon trust enough to allow herself the joy of that. The children here love her, especially the toddlers... all running up to give her kisses and snuggle their noses into her neck. She definitely has a lot of love showered on her all day long. After one of the Christmas dance competitions, I suggested the next competition should be who can make Ella smile.
Last night she began playing with my fingers holding her bottle for her and this morning as I was getting ready for my day, she was following me around the room with her watchful eyes, and she was just beginning to coo in a singsong way. It was super cute, but I didn't stop to look at her because I was afraid she would stop. I just let the music of her cute tiny voice fill my mind and heart and said a prayer that she would unlearn her past soon so she can be filled with the joy of babyhood.
And for the first time since being here, I thought, how in the world am I ever going to leave her? I know detachment is probably the best way to go in situations like this. Take care of the children and see to their needs, but do not allow yourself to become attached to them. I think I probably lost that battle the day she arrived when I was in the backseat of the car with her mother and uncle and she just crept into my heart without my knowledge or permission.
I will keep you updated on baby Ella, and her physical and emotional progress. I just hope she learns quickly that there will be milk for her at night... so I can get some sleep!! xo
Saturday, December 27, 2014
Christmas at the Nazareth Home for God's Children
We had a very Merry Christmas here in Ghana. On Christmas Eve, the house was as busy as most houses before a holiday. We were decorating, cleaning and cooking. The older children, staff and Sister Stan joined Mary Clare and me for 8pm mass where we celebrated the Christmas Vigil mass. It was very beautiful, almost the entire mass was reverently sung After mass ended, about 2-1/2 hours later, we went into the dining hall and played music, danced, drank pop and had fried chicken!! The Christmas celebration had begun!!
The next morning, Mary Clare and I prepared pancakes with Nutella spread on them for everyone for breakfast. At one point, I had Mary on my hip trying to make and flip the pancakes in hot oil... it was a challenge to say the least! The pancakes were a hit!! Then there was the usual crazy getting ready for mass, although since everyone got a new Christmas outfit and sandals, finding clothes for the kids to wear was a snap! Mary Clare and I also received new Christmas dresses in traditional African fashion. The kids and the staff were so excited to see us dressed Ghanian style!! Mass was not as reverent as the night before, with all the children there for this mass, it was noisy, but still beautiful. Between Mary and Emmanuella (that is Gmarlia's new name... we call her Ella) I had my hands full, but so did Mary Clare with 5 boys about 4 to 6 years old in her pew!!
After mass we took pictures because everyone looked so beautiful and sharp, then we danced the day away and had lots of food!! Mary Clare made awesome peanut butter cookies, and I made a rice dish with pineapples, peppers and onions in it, the kids loved it all and kept saying, "Thank you... God bless you!!"
Well into the night we danced, then on the next day, Boxing Day, we danced some more! We had dancing competitions and played musical chairs. Mary Clare and I did a Christ-centered activity with the kids and made a mural of the Nativity scene for the wall in the dining hall. Sister made fried chicken again for lunch (it was ssssooooo good!) and then we had a simple supper, followed by Mary Clare's cookies and a dessert from Father Isadore. Dancing is big here for celebrations, just in case you didn't clue into that by now!!!
Mary Clare and I both had gifts for Sister Stan, which she loved and treasured each one, and she got a kick out of the coffee-less coffee pot. Some missionary friends, Mama Paula and her husband Tom are coming here in a month (yea!!!!!!!) and will hopefully bring some coffee with them!
So, today and tomorrow are cleaning days and getting back to normal, then Monday and Tuesday will hopefully be a little calmer before the second installment of the holiday season, New Year's Eve, where I hear we will attend midnight mass (those of us who can stay up) and then... can you guess... dance!!!
It was a different Christmas without my family, and without Santa Claus, but it was beautiful and fun just the same. I am so happy to have been able to celebrate a beautiful holy day like Christmas in a different culture with different traditions and foods. It is one I am sure never to forget, no matter what happens next in my life.
I hope you have had a beautiful Christmas day as well, and I pray the rest of the Christmas season be just as beautiful, prayerful and Christ-centered as the holy day was. Cheers to you and yours!! xo
The next morning, Mary Clare and I prepared pancakes with Nutella spread on them for everyone for breakfast. At one point, I had Mary on my hip trying to make and flip the pancakes in hot oil... it was a challenge to say the least! The pancakes were a hit!! Then there was the usual crazy getting ready for mass, although since everyone got a new Christmas outfit and sandals, finding clothes for the kids to wear was a snap! Mary Clare and I also received new Christmas dresses in traditional African fashion. The kids and the staff were so excited to see us dressed Ghanian style!! Mass was not as reverent as the night before, with all the children there for this mass, it was noisy, but still beautiful. Between Mary and Emmanuella (that is Gmarlia's new name... we call her Ella) I had my hands full, but so did Mary Clare with 5 boys about 4 to 6 years old in her pew!!
After mass we took pictures because everyone looked so beautiful and sharp, then we danced the day away and had lots of food!! Mary Clare made awesome peanut butter cookies, and I made a rice dish with pineapples, peppers and onions in it, the kids loved it all and kept saying, "Thank you... God bless you!!"
Well into the night we danced, then on the next day, Boxing Day, we danced some more! We had dancing competitions and played musical chairs. Mary Clare and I did a Christ-centered activity with the kids and made a mural of the Nativity scene for the wall in the dining hall. Sister made fried chicken again for lunch (it was ssssooooo good!) and then we had a simple supper, followed by Mary Clare's cookies and a dessert from Father Isadore. Dancing is big here for celebrations, just in case you didn't clue into that by now!!!
Mary Clare and I both had gifts for Sister Stan, which she loved and treasured each one, and she got a kick out of the coffee-less coffee pot. Some missionary friends, Mama Paula and her husband Tom are coming here in a month (yea!!!!!!!) and will hopefully bring some coffee with them!
So, today and tomorrow are cleaning days and getting back to normal, then Monday and Tuesday will hopefully be a little calmer before the second installment of the holiday season, New Year's Eve, where I hear we will attend midnight mass (those of us who can stay up) and then... can you guess... dance!!!
It was a different Christmas without my family, and without Santa Claus, but it was beautiful and fun just the same. I am so happy to have been able to celebrate a beautiful holy day like Christmas in a different culture with different traditions and foods. It is one I am sure never to forget, no matter what happens next in my life.
I hope you have had a beautiful Christmas day as well, and I pray the rest of the Christmas season be just as beautiful, prayerful and Christ-centered as the holy day was. Cheers to you and yours!! xo
Wednesday, December 24, 2014
Merry Christmas!!
Christmas is my absolute favorite season. I love the decorations and lights, all the food preparation and parties, family and friends together, and the cheer and holiday spirit that seems to penetrate even the most cranky Scrooges around. I love decorating my Christmas tree, remembering who gave me each ornament and saying a quick prayer for that person, wrapping presents and just the whole spirit of the holy day.
As a child, Christmas was such a magical time of year with Santa Claus and his reindeer, making our Christmas lists, helping with holiday baking. Each year we would attend the 7pm Christmas Eve mass at St. Aloysius Gonzaga Parish where my father led the folk group singing and the life-size manger scene was so beautiful. Christmas day was spent with family for brunch, more family for dinner, and more family for the days that followed. ( We are sort of a close family!!) The gifts, the fun, the food, the Christ... all wrapped up in a few days of magic.
When I grew up, Christmas never lost it's magic for me. As an adult, I would sleep over at my parents house on Christmas Eve and celebrate in the morning with my sister Margaret and her family from Michigan and my youngest sister Anne. The joy of the day reflected in the young eyes of my nieces and nephews touched my heart and made me burst inside with happiness. Then the day continued with cinnamon rolls for breakfast, brunch and dinner with family and the knowledge in my heart and mind throughout the day that were it not for this very day, none of us would be able to enter heaven.
That is the thought that has me feeling the Christmas magic today. That because of this day, because God sent His Son, Jesus to be born of Mary, one day I will be able to see Xavier, who has no use of his legs, run and play and dance in heaven with the angels. That due to the birth of the Savior, one day I hope to see Emmanuel, who is deaf and cannot communicate, singing with joy of the glory of God. I pray one day I will see Mary in heaven, able to move and jump freely (her favorite thing is to jump up and down, but I have to hold her back and neck securely) I yearn to see all of the children here at the orphanage playing with joy and laughter in heaven, with no worries, no fears and knowing that, without a single doubt, everyone in the Kingdom of heaven loves them beyond all telling, as we hear Mary loves Jesus each day at mass. That is my hope. That is my gift this Christmas.
I cannot tell a lie... I do miss being home for Christmas. I miss my family, and I know I will miss seeing my nieces and nephews, my aunts and uncles, and especially my grandparents, parents and brothers and sisters. But as I sit here and write this, it occurs to me that in my 42 years on this planet, this is the first Christmas at home I have missed. That is pretty amazing, and it makes me feel so blessed to have been able to celebrate the day with those I love for all of those years. And all of that love, togetherness and joy I can give now to the children here, share with them my Christmas spirit, and know that whatever I give will be given back to me in their smiles, their joy and love.
I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas!! I hope and pray that the presence of the Child Jesus be with you throughout the day, that you feel His peace, love and joy, and as you celebrate the day, you remember His promise of eternal life and give thanks to God for His most ultimate gift to us, His Son.
Sending love and merry wishes... xo
As a child, Christmas was such a magical time of year with Santa Claus and his reindeer, making our Christmas lists, helping with holiday baking. Each year we would attend the 7pm Christmas Eve mass at St. Aloysius Gonzaga Parish where my father led the folk group singing and the life-size manger scene was so beautiful. Christmas day was spent with family for brunch, more family for dinner, and more family for the days that followed. ( We are sort of a close family!!) The gifts, the fun, the food, the Christ... all wrapped up in a few days of magic.
When I grew up, Christmas never lost it's magic for me. As an adult, I would sleep over at my parents house on Christmas Eve and celebrate in the morning with my sister Margaret and her family from Michigan and my youngest sister Anne. The joy of the day reflected in the young eyes of my nieces and nephews touched my heart and made me burst inside with happiness. Then the day continued with cinnamon rolls for breakfast, brunch and dinner with family and the knowledge in my heart and mind throughout the day that were it not for this very day, none of us would be able to enter heaven.
That is the thought that has me feeling the Christmas magic today. That because of this day, because God sent His Son, Jesus to be born of Mary, one day I will be able to see Xavier, who has no use of his legs, run and play and dance in heaven with the angels. That due to the birth of the Savior, one day I hope to see Emmanuel, who is deaf and cannot communicate, singing with joy of the glory of God. I pray one day I will see Mary in heaven, able to move and jump freely (her favorite thing is to jump up and down, but I have to hold her back and neck securely) I yearn to see all of the children here at the orphanage playing with joy and laughter in heaven, with no worries, no fears and knowing that, without a single doubt, everyone in the Kingdom of heaven loves them beyond all telling, as we hear Mary loves Jesus each day at mass. That is my hope. That is my gift this Christmas.
I cannot tell a lie... I do miss being home for Christmas. I miss my family, and I know I will miss seeing my nieces and nephews, my aunts and uncles, and especially my grandparents, parents and brothers and sisters. But as I sit here and write this, it occurs to me that in my 42 years on this planet, this is the first Christmas at home I have missed. That is pretty amazing, and it makes me feel so blessed to have been able to celebrate the day with those I love for all of those years. And all of that love, togetherness and joy I can give now to the children here, share with them my Christmas spirit, and know that whatever I give will be given back to me in their smiles, their joy and love.
I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas!! I hope and pray that the presence of the Child Jesus be with you throughout the day, that you feel His peace, love and joy, and as you celebrate the day, you remember His promise of eternal life and give thanks to God for His most ultimate gift to us, His Son.
Sending love and merry wishes... xo
Monday, December 22, 2014
Preparations for Christmas
Today was major preparation for Christmas at The Nazareth Home for God's Children. Here at the house, the boys received their Christmas haircuts (buzz cuts) and the girls are in the midst of doing their Christmas do's... it is a several day process. Today some of the decorations went up, the chapel in the home and the church were both cleaned, and I got to go to Tamale on a Christmas buying expedition!! (Finally, something I know how to do!!)
Mary Clare and I decided to buy Sister Stan a coffee pot. She loves coffee, but only has instant coffee here (I can almost hear the shocked exclamations from all of the addicted Starbucks and Tim Horton's coffee drinkers in the States from here!!) So, today Flora took me into one of Tamale's two "super markets," not quite super, though. They did sell coffee pots, so I picked one up, then went on a search for ground coffee and filters. And I searched, and I searched, and low and behold... although they sell coffee pots, they do not sell coffee or filters. Ummmm. Something is not quite right here...
So Flora tells me there is a better super market and we will look there. However, although slightly better, they still did not sell coffee or filters. So, Merry Christmas, Sister Stan... here is your new heated fish tank? Uh... heated water maker... or your new instant coffee keeper warmer... yeah, good old Tamale, comes through again.
Then we went to the market and bought food for Christmas, fruits and vegetables mostly. There are girls who wait with huge bowls to be hired by someone to carry their purchases, kind of like a shopping cart, if you carried it on your head. So, by the time we finished shopping, this girl, who had to have been no older than 16, carried 4 cabbages, 15 peppers, 15 onions, 3 pineapples, 4 watermelons, 4 papayas and 6 cucumbers in a HUGE bowl on her head!!!!! And she did it flawlessly with really, really bad paths to walk on, across busy streets and right to our car. Flora told me that the girls mostly get 1 or 2 dollars for doing this (!) Flora gave her $5.00, but I gave her 5 more. She almost didn't take it, but I said she may need it for her next chiropractor's visit. (I got nothing...
just crickets chirping, guess there are no chiropractors in Ghana!!)
The rest of the day was spent buying small gifts for the kids, waiting 3 hours while Flora and one of the girls, God Knows, got their hair done at a roadside beauty parlor (nothing like having your hair done on the side of the road with all the dust and people and commotion going on), and on and on our errands went until finally, at 9pm, we pulled in back home. It says something about my growth here, I think, that I think of this place as "home" and that I am so glad to return to it. All the kids come running for hugs and welcome, and the staff is full of hugs and welcome too... it is really nice!
Tomorrow, Gmarlia is coming home from the hospital. I am going to Yendi to pick her up and bring her home. Today I bought some tiny diapers for her and some formula, she was never far from my mind. And guess what?? I finally got Mary sleeping through the night (well, she wakes up at 4,but it takes her an hour to drink her bottle, and by that time I have to begin getting ready for morning prayer and mass, so it works out) and now she is moving out! Fickle roommate!! Actually, Sister asked if Mary could move in with the other toddlers (although not toddling, Mary is the same age as 3 of our other kids, Blessing, Thomas and Rejoice) and Gmarlia will be moving in with me. So, now it will be back to sleepless nights!! And something tells me that it will take a little longer for Gmarlia to sleep through the night than it took Mary. By the way, the "G" is silent in her name, and Sister will be giving her a new name when Father blesses her.
We are also getting another child tomorrow. I do not know much about her, just that she is 6 years old and was brought to the Bishop of Yendi, who called Sister and asked her to take the girl in. I will relate more details as I learn them. Sister once told me this house could hold between 75 and 100 children, we may get half way there before the end of the year at this rate!! But we are so understaffed. Please pray for workers... good, dedicated, caring workers to come and care for these kids. And, by the way, if anyone out there feels the call to come to Ghana and work as a missionary, let me tell you, the door is wide open! The welcome mat is set! I will iron the red carpet tonight! Check out the website, www.sisterstanschildren.org and let us know you're interested!!! I never thought in my wildest dreams that all of my life experiences and journeys would culminate in missionary service in Ghana, Africa... but it has happened!! As we have been hearing about Mary's "yes" to God the past few weeks, just take a moment and think about if God may be calling you to a few weeks or months or even a year as a "worker in the field" in Ghana. I was not as good as Mary. My first response to God's call was no. My second was "why would you ask me to do something so outside of myself?? Outside of what I have become believing in You?" My third response was "ok... You win." I am beginning to think that I won. ( Isn't it just a tiny bit frustrating that He is always right??)
By the way, since writing the word Starbucks above, I realized I missed out on my annual peppermint mocha. And it's all I can think about right now!!! :(
xo
Mary Clare and I decided to buy Sister Stan a coffee pot. She loves coffee, but only has instant coffee here (I can almost hear the shocked exclamations from all of the addicted Starbucks and Tim Horton's coffee drinkers in the States from here!!) So, today Flora took me into one of Tamale's two "super markets," not quite super, though. They did sell coffee pots, so I picked one up, then went on a search for ground coffee and filters. And I searched, and I searched, and low and behold... although they sell coffee pots, they do not sell coffee or filters. Ummmm. Something is not quite right here...
So Flora tells me there is a better super market and we will look there. However, although slightly better, they still did not sell coffee or filters. So, Merry Christmas, Sister Stan... here is your new heated fish tank? Uh... heated water maker... or your new instant coffee keeper warmer... yeah, good old Tamale, comes through again.
Then we went to the market and bought food for Christmas, fruits and vegetables mostly. There are girls who wait with huge bowls to be hired by someone to carry their purchases, kind of like a shopping cart, if you carried it on your head. So, by the time we finished shopping, this girl, who had to have been no older than 16, carried 4 cabbages, 15 peppers, 15 onions, 3 pineapples, 4 watermelons, 4 papayas and 6 cucumbers in a HUGE bowl on her head!!!!! And she did it flawlessly with really, really bad paths to walk on, across busy streets and right to our car. Flora told me that the girls mostly get 1 or 2 dollars for doing this (!) Flora gave her $5.00, but I gave her 5 more. She almost didn't take it, but I said she may need it for her next chiropractor's visit. (I got nothing...
just crickets chirping, guess there are no chiropractors in Ghana!!)
The rest of the day was spent buying small gifts for the kids, waiting 3 hours while Flora and one of the girls, God Knows, got their hair done at a roadside beauty parlor (nothing like having your hair done on the side of the road with all the dust and people and commotion going on), and on and on our errands went until finally, at 9pm, we pulled in back home. It says something about my growth here, I think, that I think of this place as "home" and that I am so glad to return to it. All the kids come running for hugs and welcome, and the staff is full of hugs and welcome too... it is really nice!
Tomorrow, Gmarlia is coming home from the hospital. I am going to Yendi to pick her up and bring her home. Today I bought some tiny diapers for her and some formula, she was never far from my mind. And guess what?? I finally got Mary sleeping through the night (well, she wakes up at 4,but it takes her an hour to drink her bottle, and by that time I have to begin getting ready for morning prayer and mass, so it works out) and now she is moving out! Fickle roommate!! Actually, Sister asked if Mary could move in with the other toddlers (although not toddling, Mary is the same age as 3 of our other kids, Blessing, Thomas and Rejoice) and Gmarlia will be moving in with me. So, now it will be back to sleepless nights!! And something tells me that it will take a little longer for Gmarlia to sleep through the night than it took Mary. By the way, the "G" is silent in her name, and Sister will be giving her a new name when Father blesses her.
We are also getting another child tomorrow. I do not know much about her, just that she is 6 years old and was brought to the Bishop of Yendi, who called Sister and asked her to take the girl in. I will relate more details as I learn them. Sister once told me this house could hold between 75 and 100 children, we may get half way there before the end of the year at this rate!! But we are so understaffed. Please pray for workers... good, dedicated, caring workers to come and care for these kids. And, by the way, if anyone out there feels the call to come to Ghana and work as a missionary, let me tell you, the door is wide open! The welcome mat is set! I will iron the red carpet tonight! Check out the website, www.sisterstanschildren.org and let us know you're interested!!! I never thought in my wildest dreams that all of my life experiences and journeys would culminate in missionary service in Ghana, Africa... but it has happened!! As we have been hearing about Mary's "yes" to God the past few weeks, just take a moment and think about if God may be calling you to a few weeks or months or even a year as a "worker in the field" in Ghana. I was not as good as Mary. My first response to God's call was no. My second was "why would you ask me to do something so outside of myself?? Outside of what I have become believing in You?" My third response was "ok... You win." I am beginning to think that I won. ( Isn't it just a tiny bit frustrating that He is always right??)
By the way, since writing the word Starbucks above, I realized I missed out on my annual peppermint mocha. And it's all I can think about right now!!! :(
xo
Saturday, December 20, 2014
Another Heartbreak
I was all ready to tell you about my first ever motorcycle ride and how the driver kept laughing at my cries about going too fast and forewarnings about speed bumps... it's a good story, but something happened today that completely eclipses the fun moments here.
Today I was feeding Mary lunch when Sister asked if she could see me. It turns out another child was brought to the orphanage. It is a girl and, although she looks to be about 1-1/2 months old, she is 6 months old. She is completely malnourished and sick. Here is her story:
Gmarlia was born in July in a village in the northern region of Ghana. She was born healthy, but had a lot of problems with colic and intestinal issues. Her mother's milk never really came in and so the tribe began to think that maybe Gmarlia was bad. A short time later, a healthy child died. The reason for this unfortunate death could be anything, but the tribe firmly believed that Gmarlia, at six months old, killed the baby. She was immediately condemned to death.
Sister Stan received a phone call from a local priest last night. Fr. Joseph told Sister that he had a child for her. She said we are still trying to settle from the last group of kids that came, we really cannot take another at the moment. He begged her, please, please they will kill her otherwise. Sister told Fr. Joseph that if he saves the baby, she will take her in. Father drove 2-1/2 hours to the village and arrived just in time to save Gmarlia. He brought the baby, the mother and the father's brother to the orphanage. It was actually the father's brother that reported the tribe's decision to end the life of his niece.
While Sister was getting the information from the mother, it came to light that this family, this tribe is Christian. In fact, the mother's cousin is a Catholic priest living in Rome. He was the one to call Fr. Joseph and beg him into action to save this baby. Sisters request of me... to take the baby and her mother to the Yendi hospital.
So, all of this information I have just heard is bubbling up in my head as I race around gathering clothes, as the mother dressed the baby in rags to bring her here, a bottle and formula, as the mother had no milk to nurse the baby, money, as the family never got health insurance for this child so everything we did today we had to pay for, etc, and I am almost in a tear-searing rage about this family, this tribe and how they were going to end the life of this angel.
Then, I was sitting in the car in the back seat with them, next to the mother, and it was so surreal. Here is the baby, crying endlessly out of hunger and pain and unable to be filled with anything, with her big, big brown eyes and tiny body, and the mother who is pretty rough with her, still trying to nurse her with nothing. She is talking with her brother-in-law and laughing about something, and all I can think is, dear God, is this happening?? How can this mother be sitting so comfortably and carefee knowing what she had planned to do today? Am I really racing along the African countryside in a beat up Kia with people who have so little value in the gift of life that they would plan to throw it away and share some gossip and a few jokes after? Huh??? This is so monumentally wrong that I can't even wrap my head around it. I try to see the other side of it, but I just cannot go there.
We were blessed at the hospital that it was not busy... and that I grabbed enough money to pay for everything. I don't think I will ever get used to Ghanan hospitals. I mean, here we are, meeting with the doctor, and he tells us Gmarlia is very, very sick, she is malnourished and has very poor blood. She needs a transfusion immediately. Then he looks at me and says, "Your next step is to find some blood." I think my brain stuttered for about 10 seconds, and then I said, "Find some blood? How do I do that?? What? Did you say find some blood?" and he says yes. Huh? Huh? I mean, can you imagine anything weirder? So that's what we did. We went to the lab, found and bought some blood, went to the pharmacy and bought her meds, then took her to her ward.
Well, Gmarlia is currently at the Yendi Hospital with her mother and uncle. The hospital staff has been warned about the state of the mother and has been told she cannot leave with the baby. She was having her transfusion when we left. I cannot tell you all of the things I am feeling right now. I cried in Sister's arms when I got home. I am trying so hard not to be judgmental of the tribes who practice this custom, but how can I not be? I looked into the painfilled eyes of a 6 month old baby who was slowly being starved to death on purpose. I heard her cries and I held her tiny, light body in my arms. In my world, 6 month old babies are chubby and cute with dimples who chortle and giggle for hours on end. And those that are not are cared for and loved and receive the best care. How can this continue to happen?
Please pray for Gmarlia, that she makes it through the next few days and weeks. We will be going to the hospital on Monday to see how she is doing, and we may be able to bring her home. Please pray for Sister Stan who bears the burden of her condemned children. Please pray for the families and tribes who continue to believe that the power to end a life is held by a group of elders, and no one seems safe from the firing squad, even a six month old baby. Please pray for the mothers of these tribes who Sister Stan tells me have no say in the life of their children. And please pray for me... I will continue to pray for you!! xo
Today I was feeding Mary lunch when Sister asked if she could see me. It turns out another child was brought to the orphanage. It is a girl and, although she looks to be about 1-1/2 months old, she is 6 months old. She is completely malnourished and sick. Here is her story:
Gmarlia was born in July in a village in the northern region of Ghana. She was born healthy, but had a lot of problems with colic and intestinal issues. Her mother's milk never really came in and so the tribe began to think that maybe Gmarlia was bad. A short time later, a healthy child died. The reason for this unfortunate death could be anything, but the tribe firmly believed that Gmarlia, at six months old, killed the baby. She was immediately condemned to death.
Sister Stan received a phone call from a local priest last night. Fr. Joseph told Sister that he had a child for her. She said we are still trying to settle from the last group of kids that came, we really cannot take another at the moment. He begged her, please, please they will kill her otherwise. Sister told Fr. Joseph that if he saves the baby, she will take her in. Father drove 2-1/2 hours to the village and arrived just in time to save Gmarlia. He brought the baby, the mother and the father's brother to the orphanage. It was actually the father's brother that reported the tribe's decision to end the life of his niece.
While Sister was getting the information from the mother, it came to light that this family, this tribe is Christian. In fact, the mother's cousin is a Catholic priest living in Rome. He was the one to call Fr. Joseph and beg him into action to save this baby. Sisters request of me... to take the baby and her mother to the Yendi hospital.
So, all of this information I have just heard is bubbling up in my head as I race around gathering clothes, as the mother dressed the baby in rags to bring her here, a bottle and formula, as the mother had no milk to nurse the baby, money, as the family never got health insurance for this child so everything we did today we had to pay for, etc, and I am almost in a tear-searing rage about this family, this tribe and how they were going to end the life of this angel.
Then, I was sitting in the car in the back seat with them, next to the mother, and it was so surreal. Here is the baby, crying endlessly out of hunger and pain and unable to be filled with anything, with her big, big brown eyes and tiny body, and the mother who is pretty rough with her, still trying to nurse her with nothing. She is talking with her brother-in-law and laughing about something, and all I can think is, dear God, is this happening?? How can this mother be sitting so comfortably and carefee knowing what she had planned to do today? Am I really racing along the African countryside in a beat up Kia with people who have so little value in the gift of life that they would plan to throw it away and share some gossip and a few jokes after? Huh??? This is so monumentally wrong that I can't even wrap my head around it. I try to see the other side of it, but I just cannot go there.
We were blessed at the hospital that it was not busy... and that I grabbed enough money to pay for everything. I don't think I will ever get used to Ghanan hospitals. I mean, here we are, meeting with the doctor, and he tells us Gmarlia is very, very sick, she is malnourished and has very poor blood. She needs a transfusion immediately. Then he looks at me and says, "Your next step is to find some blood." I think my brain stuttered for about 10 seconds, and then I said, "Find some blood? How do I do that?? What? Did you say find some blood?" and he says yes. Huh? Huh? I mean, can you imagine anything weirder? So that's what we did. We went to the lab, found and bought some blood, went to the pharmacy and bought her meds, then took her to her ward.
Well, Gmarlia is currently at the Yendi Hospital with her mother and uncle. The hospital staff has been warned about the state of the mother and has been told she cannot leave with the baby. She was having her transfusion when we left. I cannot tell you all of the things I am feeling right now. I cried in Sister's arms when I got home. I am trying so hard not to be judgmental of the tribes who practice this custom, but how can I not be? I looked into the painfilled eyes of a 6 month old baby who was slowly being starved to death on purpose. I heard her cries and I held her tiny, light body in my arms. In my world, 6 month old babies are chubby and cute with dimples who chortle and giggle for hours on end. And those that are not are cared for and loved and receive the best care. How can this continue to happen?
Please pray for Gmarlia, that she makes it through the next few days and weeks. We will be going to the hospital on Monday to see how she is doing, and we may be able to bring her home. Please pray for Sister Stan who bears the burden of her condemned children. Please pray for the families and tribes who continue to believe that the power to end a life is held by a group of elders, and no one seems safe from the firing squad, even a six month old baby. Please pray for the mothers of these tribes who Sister Stan tells me have no say in the life of their children. And please pray for me... I will continue to pray for you!! xo
Friday, December 19, 2014
A Week in Review
Sorry for the lack of posting this week. Just as the week before Christmas is a little crazy in the States, it is here too, but for slightly different reasons!!
Here's my week in a nutshell:
On Monday I was recuperating from my Sunday follies. I took Mary Clare to see the old house because she had never seen it. I could hardly believe it myself, how small and run down the house is. It's tiny kitchen, one bedroom for the boys, one for the girls, no real community room- that was what the courtyard was used for. The sides of the house are falling down, and the one bathroom is so tiny and dingy... I looked around and I think I really saw the place for the first time. In January, I was so focused on the kids and in a place that small, 35 kids take up a lot of it!!
But there were some advantages to being in a smaller house, not that I would want them to go back to that place. But when you are in a small place and have 35 children, you know where everyone is. In this new house, with its 8 acres of land, it is so hard to find all the kids. Most of them hang out in groups, but you have a few stragglers who you are always looking around for. It was also easier to keep clean!! A huge house and acres of land are hard to keep up... especially in this neck of the woods where everywhere you go, trash on the side of the road is a part of the local scenery. In a related diversion, sometimes the wind blows so hard, all the garbage and dust from the roadside blow up over the walls of the house and into the courtyard. The first day that happened, I felt like Chicken Little, believing the sky was falling!! Anyways, the kids have picked up the bad Ghanan habit of littering, which we are trying to change, but with 8 acres of land, it makes it difficult to keep clean!!
On Tuesday, I was in a cleaning frenzy. I put on my favorite Christmas CD, The Roches "We Three Kings" and cleaned my room. Mary loves this cd too. She thinks it's angel's singing!! You should see her look for them around the room! Mary and I also started her intensive physical therapy workouts (well, as intensive as you can get with a two year old!!) I missed Mary so much when I was sick. She's my sunshine!!
On Wednesday I woke refreshed as Mary slept through the entire night!! I was so proud of her, and happy for the extra sleep, of course!! I hope it's a trend. During lunch on Wednesday, someone brought John to us, who is about 6 years old, and showed us a rash he has on his legs and arms. We had been treating his left calf for ringworm, but this new rash was all over and was oozing pus and blood. We called Sister, who was out of town till Thursday, who told me to send Mary Clare with John to the Yendi Hospital. So, they left around one and I took care of the home. John returned around dinner time with medicine and cream for his rashes. Thankfully, they are already better and healing. We also found out about 8pm that we were taking 10 children to the psychiatric doctors at the Tamale Teaching Hospital at 7am tomorrow. So, there was a late mad dash for clothes, shoes and supplies for the kids.
On Thursday we awoke around 4:30 am to begin the process of getting ready for the hospital. Waking, bathing, dressing and feeding 10 children with severe mental handicaps is not easy!! Sister wanted us gone by 7am, and Mary Clare and I with the kids were ready be 6:50... but the workers weren't ready so we didn't leave until around 8... next time we will sleep a little longer. I said a rosary on the way to the hospital for patience and help from God for this trip. I don't know if you remember last month's journey with these kids, with Felicia and Fransisca biting and scratching us, Godfrey running away and Matina's seizure... I was scared it would all happen again. Well, as usual, God came through!! We had a good trip! We didn't have to wait too long. We were approached by some hospital employees who inquired about the children and were so moved by the circumstances of the orphanage and our involvement in it, that they helped get us moving. Then we met several doctors who gave me their contact info because they want to come and help. Sister told me to send them an email, but don't hold my breath... she's been let down so many times by local doctors promising to come and help. Maybe this time??? It was good to be able to go into the doctors room and be able to give specific information about each child. They all are on medication, the Teaching Hospital loves to give out phenobarbital!!!! We returned at a decent time too, around 2pm, so all in all, it was a good day at the hospital... wait... did those words just come off my keypad? It's a Christmas Miracle!!
And, today is Friday... the first day of Christmas vacation for the kids... yikes!! It is a good day so far, though. Mary Clare and I were busy in meetings with Sister most of the morning, so the kids were on their own, but the older kids really stepped up and helped out. Sammy is the second oldest boy here, about 15 years old. In January he was a part of everything and always with the little kids helping out and doing chores. He is the most changed since then, I think. He is separate from everyone, hardly ever at prayers, there are days that go by that I never see him. Last night Mary Clare and I had a talk with him about all of this. The younger boys look up to him so much, I just don't want him to get lost and go a bad way here, and lead others along the same path. He is on a huge precipice here, and one tip in the wrong direction and I fear we will lose him. Also, Sister had a police officer come to question him last night because he has been jumping the wall at night and going into the village, lying about where he has been after school, and has even stolen from Sister. Sammy needs a lot of prayers. Today he has been better, with the kids and helping out, but that's just today. He's probably spooked by the officer, who showed up with a huge rifle!! Please pray for Sammy, that we can help him to find his way to a bright and happy future!! Thank you!!
I hope everyone has a great weekend before Christmas!! We are going to be having choir practice and cleaning the house for Christmas. I love this time of year!! xo
Here's my week in a nutshell:
On Monday I was recuperating from my Sunday follies. I took Mary Clare to see the old house because she had never seen it. I could hardly believe it myself, how small and run down the house is. It's tiny kitchen, one bedroom for the boys, one for the girls, no real community room- that was what the courtyard was used for. The sides of the house are falling down, and the one bathroom is so tiny and dingy... I looked around and I think I really saw the place for the first time. In January, I was so focused on the kids and in a place that small, 35 kids take up a lot of it!!
But there were some advantages to being in a smaller house, not that I would want them to go back to that place. But when you are in a small place and have 35 children, you know where everyone is. In this new house, with its 8 acres of land, it is so hard to find all the kids. Most of them hang out in groups, but you have a few stragglers who you are always looking around for. It was also easier to keep clean!! A huge house and acres of land are hard to keep up... especially in this neck of the woods where everywhere you go, trash on the side of the road is a part of the local scenery. In a related diversion, sometimes the wind blows so hard, all the garbage and dust from the roadside blow up over the walls of the house and into the courtyard. The first day that happened, I felt like Chicken Little, believing the sky was falling!! Anyways, the kids have picked up the bad Ghanan habit of littering, which we are trying to change, but with 8 acres of land, it makes it difficult to keep clean!!
On Tuesday, I was in a cleaning frenzy. I put on my favorite Christmas CD, The Roches "We Three Kings" and cleaned my room. Mary loves this cd too. She thinks it's angel's singing!! You should see her look for them around the room! Mary and I also started her intensive physical therapy workouts (well, as intensive as you can get with a two year old!!) I missed Mary so much when I was sick. She's my sunshine!!
On Wednesday I woke refreshed as Mary slept through the entire night!! I was so proud of her, and happy for the extra sleep, of course!! I hope it's a trend. During lunch on Wednesday, someone brought John to us, who is about 6 years old, and showed us a rash he has on his legs and arms. We had been treating his left calf for ringworm, but this new rash was all over and was oozing pus and blood. We called Sister, who was out of town till Thursday, who told me to send Mary Clare with John to the Yendi Hospital. So, they left around one and I took care of the home. John returned around dinner time with medicine and cream for his rashes. Thankfully, they are already better and healing. We also found out about 8pm that we were taking 10 children to the psychiatric doctors at the Tamale Teaching Hospital at 7am tomorrow. So, there was a late mad dash for clothes, shoes and supplies for the kids.
On Thursday we awoke around 4:30 am to begin the process of getting ready for the hospital. Waking, bathing, dressing and feeding 10 children with severe mental handicaps is not easy!! Sister wanted us gone by 7am, and Mary Clare and I with the kids were ready be 6:50... but the workers weren't ready so we didn't leave until around 8... next time we will sleep a little longer. I said a rosary on the way to the hospital for patience and help from God for this trip. I don't know if you remember last month's journey with these kids, with Felicia and Fransisca biting and scratching us, Godfrey running away and Matina's seizure... I was scared it would all happen again. Well, as usual, God came through!! We had a good trip! We didn't have to wait too long. We were approached by some hospital employees who inquired about the children and were so moved by the circumstances of the orphanage and our involvement in it, that they helped get us moving. Then we met several doctors who gave me their contact info because they want to come and help. Sister told me to send them an email, but don't hold my breath... she's been let down so many times by local doctors promising to come and help. Maybe this time??? It was good to be able to go into the doctors room and be able to give specific information about each child. They all are on medication, the Teaching Hospital loves to give out phenobarbital!!!! We returned at a decent time too, around 2pm, so all in all, it was a good day at the hospital... wait... did those words just come off my keypad? It's a Christmas Miracle!!
And, today is Friday... the first day of Christmas vacation for the kids... yikes!! It is a good day so far, though. Mary Clare and I were busy in meetings with Sister most of the morning, so the kids were on their own, but the older kids really stepped up and helped out. Sammy is the second oldest boy here, about 15 years old. In January he was a part of everything and always with the little kids helping out and doing chores. He is the most changed since then, I think. He is separate from everyone, hardly ever at prayers, there are days that go by that I never see him. Last night Mary Clare and I had a talk with him about all of this. The younger boys look up to him so much, I just don't want him to get lost and go a bad way here, and lead others along the same path. He is on a huge precipice here, and one tip in the wrong direction and I fear we will lose him. Also, Sister had a police officer come to question him last night because he has been jumping the wall at night and going into the village, lying about where he has been after school, and has even stolen from Sister. Sammy needs a lot of prayers. Today he has been better, with the kids and helping out, but that's just today. He's probably spooked by the officer, who showed up with a huge rifle!! Please pray for Sammy, that we can help him to find his way to a bright and happy future!! Thank you!!
I hope everyone has a great weekend before Christmas!! We are going to be having choir practice and cleaning the house for Christmas. I love this time of year!! xo
Sunday, December 14, 2014
Water, Water Nowhere and Not a Drop to Flush
First of all, I would like to apologize to the author of "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner" for grossly misusing what is arguably the most famous line in the poem: "Water, water everywhere and not a drop to drink." It is a line I have abused before, and probably will again, but never in print. Sorry!!
We have been getting to know each other over the past month, so I feel my comfort level rising regarding the things that happen "behind closed doors" here. Sorry to spoil the fun, but this not a tantalizing tale, if fact it's quite gross. See where friendship gets you??
Last night, around midnight, I got the stomach flu... at least I am hoping that is all it is. No fever, so you Ebola worriers can just relax. Although, as a side note, this morning, outside my bedroom, the children were making rhymes about Ebola!! Something I have never heard here... kinda strange that they would pick today to become interested in world news and affairs!! I was up all night and had to wake Mary Clare very late to take Mary into her room. I was vomiting and had a runny stomach, as they call it here... my grandfather quite seriously calls it the "back door trots!!" :o
Anyways, around 8am, I ran out of water to flush the toilet. (we have toilets in our bathrooms where you pour water from a large plastic container into the tank of the toilet and flush it.) I had only been flushing it every other time or so, but I ran out. When Mary Clare came to check on me, which she did all day long, the sweetheart, I told her. So, around 10 am, I had gone a few more times, and a few more by 2pm. I was very unfavorably being reminded of the little league port-a-potties that we had to use at my brothers' base ball games. The smell in my room was pungent, to say the least, and it just all felt so filthy.
I started thinking about the numerous times I had the flu in my life. On one occasion, my parents took us, I think we were 6 children at the time, 2 more came later, to a chicken restaurant, the Chicken Bucket or something like that, and we all ended up with food poisoning and were all sick during the night. Can you imagine, just imagine, that happening here, at the Nazareth Home for God's Children, where we can spend at least part of the day with no water? It is not something I want to spend any more time thinking about!! Well, finally around 5pm, I got some water, and just behind the girls carrying water, came Mary Clare to clean my bathroom... just about the most amazing and selfless act of mercy I have ever heard of in my entire life. And just like that, the smell was gone and the cleansing, freshness of water made everything bearable somehow.
I also began thinking of water in terms of my faith. That Jesus, and in His place, the priest, uses water and wine in the consecration, which becomes the Blood of Christ, how so many of the miracles and teachings of Jesus in the Bible happened in and around water, how holy water is an essential part of our sacramental life, beginning with baptism and ending with anointing of the sick, and how blood and water flowed from the wounds of our Lord on the cross. Water is an essential part of life, in general and in the Church, and it seems its relevance and importance is only thought of when it is difficult to find. That is here!!
The human body can live without food for several days, maybe even a week, but not without water. We ourselves are made up of mostly water, as is our planet. But here in the dry lands of Ghana, water is a every day worry. In a place where belief in God and in His saving grace is our lifeline, we pray daily for water and the freshness and cleanliness and life it brings.
Now, Rita, one of the staff here, just brought me some spicy fishy soup. I explained to her about stomach linings and it being tender for a few days, but she stayed in my room like a prison warden making sure I ate it. She just got called out of my room... do you think it would be so bad if I flushed that down the toilet?? Would it conflict so terribly with my musings above?
;) xo
We have been getting to know each other over the past month, so I feel my comfort level rising regarding the things that happen "behind closed doors" here. Sorry to spoil the fun, but this not a tantalizing tale, if fact it's quite gross. See where friendship gets you??
Last night, around midnight, I got the stomach flu... at least I am hoping that is all it is. No fever, so you Ebola worriers can just relax. Although, as a side note, this morning, outside my bedroom, the children were making rhymes about Ebola!! Something I have never heard here... kinda strange that they would pick today to become interested in world news and affairs!! I was up all night and had to wake Mary Clare very late to take Mary into her room. I was vomiting and had a runny stomach, as they call it here... my grandfather quite seriously calls it the "back door trots!!" :o
Anyways, around 8am, I ran out of water to flush the toilet. (we have toilets in our bathrooms where you pour water from a large plastic container into the tank of the toilet and flush it.) I had only been flushing it every other time or so, but I ran out. When Mary Clare came to check on me, which she did all day long, the sweetheart, I told her. So, around 10 am, I had gone a few more times, and a few more by 2pm. I was very unfavorably being reminded of the little league port-a-potties that we had to use at my brothers' base ball games. The smell in my room was pungent, to say the least, and it just all felt so filthy.
I started thinking about the numerous times I had the flu in my life. On one occasion, my parents took us, I think we were 6 children at the time, 2 more came later, to a chicken restaurant, the Chicken Bucket or something like that, and we all ended up with food poisoning and were all sick during the night. Can you imagine, just imagine, that happening here, at the Nazareth Home for God's Children, where we can spend at least part of the day with no water? It is not something I want to spend any more time thinking about!! Well, finally around 5pm, I got some water, and just behind the girls carrying water, came Mary Clare to clean my bathroom... just about the most amazing and selfless act of mercy I have ever heard of in my entire life. And just like that, the smell was gone and the cleansing, freshness of water made everything bearable somehow.
I also began thinking of water in terms of my faith. That Jesus, and in His place, the priest, uses water and wine in the consecration, which becomes the Blood of Christ, how so many of the miracles and teachings of Jesus in the Bible happened in and around water, how holy water is an essential part of our sacramental life, beginning with baptism and ending with anointing of the sick, and how blood and water flowed from the wounds of our Lord on the cross. Water is an essential part of life, in general and in the Church, and it seems its relevance and importance is only thought of when it is difficult to find. That is here!!
The human body can live without food for several days, maybe even a week, but not without water. We ourselves are made up of mostly water, as is our planet. But here in the dry lands of Ghana, water is a every day worry. In a place where belief in God and in His saving grace is our lifeline, we pray daily for water and the freshness and cleanliness and life it brings.
Now, Rita, one of the staff here, just brought me some spicy fishy soup. I explained to her about stomach linings and it being tender for a few days, but she stayed in my room like a prison warden making sure I ate it. She just got called out of my room... do you think it would be so bad if I flushed that down the toilet?? Would it conflict so terribly with my musings above?
;) xo
Friday, December 12, 2014
Sleep Deprived in Ghana
I apologize for my lack of blogging lately. I have taken on the role of Mary's nighttime caretaker and any extra time I have during the day is spent sleeping! She is missing her mom so much. Her mother must have fed her each night at 10pm and midnight, because, like clockwork, Mary wakes at those times every night. Since we are no longer breast feeding her, we are trying to break her of the habit of waking during the night. Unfortunately, we have no bottles here, so I have been spoon feeding Mary milk and water. Although 2 years old, Mary was always treated like an infant, so she acts like one, and as a result of the cerebral palsy, she has little control over her neck and extremities, which really makes her like an infant... a big infant!!
Mary is usually up for at least 1-1/2 hours each time she awakes. I think the nights are hardest for her. She misses that intimacy of just her and her mom, and that surety that whenever she needs it, milk is there. I am filled with remorse for Mary, for she is grieving the loss of her mother and is not too happy to find me at her crib side each night. I have recently realized that I have never given mothers and fathers enough praise and credit for getting up with their children during the night and then having the energy to get through the next day. I have been getting by on about 4 hours of sleep each night and then managing to get through the entire day with her and the rest of the kids and all my duties. I think there is a selflessness about parenthood that allows parents to put themselves and their needs last, and out of that sacrifice comes the strength to get through the day, and be up again the next night. Not that I consider myself Mary's parent, but I have a special connection with that tiny tot that pulls on my heart strings each time she cries.
On to other news... did you know it gets cold in Ghana?? I didn't! It is cold!! Now, I know in Buffalo, at least, there is a ton of snow and the daytime high is probably around 30 degrees ... I'm not talking that cold, but when you are used to temps in the 90's, 60 degrees is cold! The problem is that with the colder temps comes the wind and blowing dust. It has made almost all the residents of The Nazareth Home for God's Children sick with bad coughs and runny noses. One of our girls, Martha who is 4 years old, was just released from the Yendi Hospital for treatment of pneumonia, and Sister Stan says it is likely more children will get it. Joshua, who is about 8 years old, but because of malnutrition and a mental disability appears to be about 4 years old, has taken a liking to me. He did in January too... They call him Ohyea because "ohyea" is the only thing he says, over and over. He walks around, collecting sticks and stones to carry and is usually in his own little world until he sees me and then attaches himself to my legs. Well, I mention him now because he has this terrible runny nose, which he loves to blow on my pants. He just walks right up to me, sticks his nose on my leg and blows!! It was funny, like the first time he did it, but now I am tired of hand washing pants every single day. I have no idea why he does it at all, and to me and to no one else. Must be love!!
As we are getting nearer to Christmas, we have choir practice with Christmas songs and are preparing for the feast, although there are no Christmas decorations around. This is Advent, and here at the orphanage, much emphasis is put on the Advent season and preparing ourselves for the birth of Jesus. The decorating will come on Christmas day, the birthday of our Lord, and the celebrating will continue well into January until the official end of the Christmas season, which I believe is the Baptism of Jesus in the Jordan River, but I may be incorrect about that. It is beautiful to focus on Advent fully and completely and not be overrun by the commercialism and hype of the holiday of Christmas, which really is a holy day, not a holiday at all. Don't get me wrong, I love the carols and lights, the festivities and parties, but it does take away from the true meaning of Christmas. I don't mean to get all "Charlie Brown" on you, but this year, my focus will be on celebrating the birth of the King of kings, and I am looking forward to a truly heartfelt holy day in which my Lord is the center.
Roundtrip ticket to Africa... $1,500.00 /// the preparing and purchasing personal needs for a year...$I don't know, but it's a lot.00 /// being taught by orphans how to truly celebrate Christmas... priceless!!
xo
Mary is usually up for at least 1-1/2 hours each time she awakes. I think the nights are hardest for her. She misses that intimacy of just her and her mom, and that surety that whenever she needs it, milk is there. I am filled with remorse for Mary, for she is grieving the loss of her mother and is not too happy to find me at her crib side each night. I have recently realized that I have never given mothers and fathers enough praise and credit for getting up with their children during the night and then having the energy to get through the next day. I have been getting by on about 4 hours of sleep each night and then managing to get through the entire day with her and the rest of the kids and all my duties. I think there is a selflessness about parenthood that allows parents to put themselves and their needs last, and out of that sacrifice comes the strength to get through the day, and be up again the next night. Not that I consider myself Mary's parent, but I have a special connection with that tiny tot that pulls on my heart strings each time she cries.
On to other news... did you know it gets cold in Ghana?? I didn't! It is cold!! Now, I know in Buffalo, at least, there is a ton of snow and the daytime high is probably around 30 degrees ... I'm not talking that cold, but when you are used to temps in the 90's, 60 degrees is cold! The problem is that with the colder temps comes the wind and blowing dust. It has made almost all the residents of The Nazareth Home for God's Children sick with bad coughs and runny noses. One of our girls, Martha who is 4 years old, was just released from the Yendi Hospital for treatment of pneumonia, and Sister Stan says it is likely more children will get it. Joshua, who is about 8 years old, but because of malnutrition and a mental disability appears to be about 4 years old, has taken a liking to me. He did in January too... They call him Ohyea because "ohyea" is the only thing he says, over and over. He walks around, collecting sticks and stones to carry and is usually in his own little world until he sees me and then attaches himself to my legs. Well, I mention him now because he has this terrible runny nose, which he loves to blow on my pants. He just walks right up to me, sticks his nose on my leg and blows!! It was funny, like the first time he did it, but now I am tired of hand washing pants every single day. I have no idea why he does it at all, and to me and to no one else. Must be love!!
As we are getting nearer to Christmas, we have choir practice with Christmas songs and are preparing for the feast, although there are no Christmas decorations around. This is Advent, and here at the orphanage, much emphasis is put on the Advent season and preparing ourselves for the birth of Jesus. The decorating will come on Christmas day, the birthday of our Lord, and the celebrating will continue well into January until the official end of the Christmas season, which I believe is the Baptism of Jesus in the Jordan River, but I may be incorrect about that. It is beautiful to focus on Advent fully and completely and not be overrun by the commercialism and hype of the holiday of Christmas, which really is a holy day, not a holiday at all. Don't get me wrong, I love the carols and lights, the festivities and parties, but it does take away from the true meaning of Christmas. I don't mean to get all "Charlie Brown" on you, but this year, my focus will be on celebrating the birth of the King of kings, and I am looking forward to a truly heartfelt holy day in which my Lord is the center.
Roundtrip ticket to Africa... $1,500.00 /// the preparing and purchasing personal needs for a year...$I don't know, but it's a lot.00 /// being taught by orphans how to truly celebrate Christmas... priceless!!
xo
Wednesday, December 10, 2014
A Rock and a Hard Place
A few days ago, one of the girls here, Matina, had a seizure. Matina is about 12 years old and is a recently cane to live at the Nazareth Home for God's Children. Matina is on seizure medication, but the other morning she had a seizure at school. We did not find out about it until a few hours later. Matina was a little out of it and couldn't open one of her eyes, which was tearing. Matina does not speak English, except to repeat what is said to her, so figuring out where it hurts and piecing together what happened is difficult to say the least.
Our fear was that she may have a concussion, so Sister Stan decided we should take her to the hospital in Yendi. I had never been there before. We have an "in" there because one of Sister's nieces, Edna, is a nurse at the Yendi Hospital. It is considerably smaller than the Tamale Teaching Hospital. Although it services about 20 villages surrounding it, there are few doctors working at this hospital. I have been making jokes about being constantly reminded of "Little House on the Prairie" here, but in the case of the Yendi Hospital, it is an accurate description.
We were first taken to the NICU where Edna works. She currently has 3 babies there. I could not see any heart monitors, the babies were just in cribs, and spirally wired cribs at that. Paperwork was all over the place and there was no place to wash hands or any gloves or hand sanitizers to be found. Next we were taken to the office of the hospital to begin a folder for Matina, who has never been there before. People waiting to see a doctor were laying around everywhere. With so many villages looking for care here, and limited doctors, Edna told me that it could be days until some of these people were seen. They just pick a spot and camp out until called.
Everywhere we went was dirty, with paint chipping off the walls and numerous bugs everywhere. There were rooms filled with broken wire-framed beds and, seriously, the filth everywhere was so depressing. Maybe in the United States we are too germ phobic, but here seems to be the exact opposite.
We got to see a doctor, thanks to Edna, but we received a lecture on the medicine not having the time to completely enter her system and we have to be patient to see if the seizures stopped. We tried to explain that we thought she may have a concussion, but no one took her vitals or did any kind of exam on her other than a no touching visual exam. The doctor then told us he needed labs done on her, and that when we were done to come back to him. So we went and Matina got a pin prick blood sample taken (again, no gloves or proper sanitation to be found), then returned to the doctors office only to find that he had left.
We saw another doctor, and basically went through the same stuff again, then he told us to keep her on the medication she is on for 3 months, keep a record of her seizures, then return and they would see what to do next.
Thankfully, Matina did not have a concussion, and we have our Buffalo medical saviors to thank for helping us figure that out. I find the orphanage in-between a rock and a hard place here in terms of hospitals. On one side, you have the Tamale Teaching Hospital which has better equipment and more doctors and specialists, but you can never see them. (Elizabeth went yesterday, and they told her to come back today) And on the other side, you have the equivalent of hospitals in America about 200 years ago at the Yendi Hospital, where we can see doctors because of our "in", but what is even done for the patients??
By the way, an update on Mary... Mary's mother left yesterday. Her husband contacted her and told her to come to him. So she knelt on the ground and begged Sister to let her go. Sister did, but the mother left Mary without a backwards glance, no hug or kiss or tears at all for her baby. She practically skipped out of the orphanage. My heart is crushed... but I do have a new sleep-over friend!! Mary is staying in my room for the time being, until we can get her on a regular sleeping schedule. She had a good night last night, she only woke up twice to eat, and loves to be sung to. Her favorite song is "Hail Mary, Gentle Woman." xo
Our fear was that she may have a concussion, so Sister Stan decided we should take her to the hospital in Yendi. I had never been there before. We have an "in" there because one of Sister's nieces, Edna, is a nurse at the Yendi Hospital. It is considerably smaller than the Tamale Teaching Hospital. Although it services about 20 villages surrounding it, there are few doctors working at this hospital. I have been making jokes about being constantly reminded of "Little House on the Prairie" here, but in the case of the Yendi Hospital, it is an accurate description.
We were first taken to the NICU where Edna works. She currently has 3 babies there. I could not see any heart monitors, the babies were just in cribs, and spirally wired cribs at that. Paperwork was all over the place and there was no place to wash hands or any gloves or hand sanitizers to be found. Next we were taken to the office of the hospital to begin a folder for Matina, who has never been there before. People waiting to see a doctor were laying around everywhere. With so many villages looking for care here, and limited doctors, Edna told me that it could be days until some of these people were seen. They just pick a spot and camp out until called.
Everywhere we went was dirty, with paint chipping off the walls and numerous bugs everywhere. There were rooms filled with broken wire-framed beds and, seriously, the filth everywhere was so depressing. Maybe in the United States we are too germ phobic, but here seems to be the exact opposite.
We got to see a doctor, thanks to Edna, but we received a lecture on the medicine not having the time to completely enter her system and we have to be patient to see if the seizures stopped. We tried to explain that we thought she may have a concussion, but no one took her vitals or did any kind of exam on her other than a no touching visual exam. The doctor then told us he needed labs done on her, and that when we were done to come back to him. So we went and Matina got a pin prick blood sample taken (again, no gloves or proper sanitation to be found), then returned to the doctors office only to find that he had left.
We saw another doctor, and basically went through the same stuff again, then he told us to keep her on the medication she is on for 3 months, keep a record of her seizures, then return and they would see what to do next.
Thankfully, Matina did not have a concussion, and we have our Buffalo medical saviors to thank for helping us figure that out. I find the orphanage in-between a rock and a hard place here in terms of hospitals. On one side, you have the Tamale Teaching Hospital which has better equipment and more doctors and specialists, but you can never see them. (Elizabeth went yesterday, and they told her to come back today) And on the other side, you have the equivalent of hospitals in America about 200 years ago at the Yendi Hospital, where we can see doctors because of our "in", but what is even done for the patients??
By the way, an update on Mary... Mary's mother left yesterday. Her husband contacted her and told her to come to him. So she knelt on the ground and begged Sister to let her go. Sister did, but the mother left Mary without a backwards glance, no hug or kiss or tears at all for her baby. She practically skipped out of the orphanage. My heart is crushed... but I do have a new sleep-over friend!! Mary is staying in my room for the time being, until we can get her on a regular sleeping schedule. She had a good night last night, she only woke up twice to eat, and loves to be sung to. Her favorite song is "Hail Mary, Gentle Woman." xo
Monday, December 8, 2014
Loving Mary
A few days ago, I told you about Mary, a two year old girl with cerebral palsy who is really in the process of being abandoned by her parents. Mary's mother was supposed to meet with her father over the weekend, but he never showed up. He was going to bring her money so she could afford to go home. So, Mary and her mother are still here.
What I have a problem understanding is how a woman, with love in her eyes when she looks at her daughter, can just leave her. She swells with pride whenever I take the time to try to make Mary smile, she cuddles and sings to her. Maybe she thinks that here Mary would get a better life than anywhere else she can think of. Sister Stan tells me that when Mary's mother looks at her, she just sees a problem, the reason she is not with her family and husband, someone not worth loving.
It is startling, the different views Sister and I have upon witnessing the situation. These are her people, and she knows the culture best, obviously, so I guess Sister is probably right. But while I am filled with squishy, wishy-washy emotion at this heartbreak, Sister sees it with pragmatism and without the emotion I am swimming in. I guess I keep on trying to put myself in the mother's place and will her to keep Mary, to see who her daughter is past the illness, to love without condition. But as much as I try, it never works, and the pain I feel for Mary, and for her mother, just grows.
All I can say is that I do not comprehend a tiny bit of all this. All of the children here at The Nazareth Home for God's Children are in need of special care. Probably none of them will ever lead what you and I consider "normal lives." And I will admit that there are moments when the emotion I feel towards some of them is not so lovey-dovey... but let me reassure you, each child is worthy of love.
I suppose this will go on until Mary's mother finds the money to return home. Sister Stan believes that in her heart, the mother is already gone, already planning the next child, who, this time, will be "perfect." Well, in Mary's smile I see the light of God's reflection, and in taking the time to work with her poor little body, I feel a connection and trust that is hard to find in this world. If only the mother could see that.
If only. xo
What I have a problem understanding is how a woman, with love in her eyes when she looks at her daughter, can just leave her. She swells with pride whenever I take the time to try to make Mary smile, she cuddles and sings to her. Maybe she thinks that here Mary would get a better life than anywhere else she can think of. Sister Stan tells me that when Mary's mother looks at her, she just sees a problem, the reason she is not with her family and husband, someone not worth loving.
It is startling, the different views Sister and I have upon witnessing the situation. These are her people, and she knows the culture best, obviously, so I guess Sister is probably right. But while I am filled with squishy, wishy-washy emotion at this heartbreak, Sister sees it with pragmatism and without the emotion I am swimming in. I guess I keep on trying to put myself in the mother's place and will her to keep Mary, to see who her daughter is past the illness, to love without condition. But as much as I try, it never works, and the pain I feel for Mary, and for her mother, just grows.
All I can say is that I do not comprehend a tiny bit of all this. All of the children here at The Nazareth Home for God's Children are in need of special care. Probably none of them will ever lead what you and I consider "normal lives." And I will admit that there are moments when the emotion I feel towards some of them is not so lovey-dovey... but let me reassure you, each child is worthy of love.
I suppose this will go on until Mary's mother finds the money to return home. Sister Stan believes that in her heart, the mother is already gone, already planning the next child, who, this time, will be "perfect." Well, in Mary's smile I see the light of God's reflection, and in taking the time to work with her poor little body, I feel a connection and trust that is hard to find in this world. If only the mother could see that.
If only. xo
Sunday, December 7, 2014
Month #1 In Review
I can hardly believe tomorrow will be a month since Mary Clare and I have been in Ghana! It has gone by very fast, and we have been through so much already!! Here's a little synopsis of the month:
*****Funniest Thing That Happened This Month****
Sister's newest orphans are these puppies who have been abandoned by the mommy dog. It must be something in the water here, or something!! Anyways, I am, sorry to say for all you dog lovers out there, not a dog person. The puppies are cute... there are 4 black ones and 3 yellow ones. Here in Africa, they are not given names, allowed in the house, or treated like one of the family. They will be used for protection against trespassers when they are big enough. They are living on one side of the house. Well, one day I was taking the toddlers for a walk around the house. We were strolling along, and I was pointing out colors and flowers, bugs and trees, and they were repeating what I was saying. All of the sudden, we turn the corner, and you would have thought they were on fire. Screaming like I have never heard before scorched my ears and the 6 little tykes all grabbed on to my legs so tightly I couldn't move. They were afraid of the puppies. Well, here I am, with the toddlers in a state of complete and total panic, with no one around to help, and I cannot move because 12 little hands were digging into me for dear life. I couldn't even take a step for fear one of them would go toppling to the ground. So I take these little tiny steps, with my frenzied tykes in tow until we turn the corner, which took some time, let me tell you. And then... Silence... until they see the cows, then it starts all over again!!!
********Health Update********
Mary Clare and I have taken over the medical responsibilities of the house. Mary Clare is so good at treating the children. She has patience and a sweetness about her, and yet is fearless when it comes to cleaning wounds and administering meds. Ajah is doing much better. His wounds are healing. He still loves Mary and I, but when we take him into the room we use as a medical center, he cries and cries. Poor little guy! Elizabeth is not fairing as well. The hole in her foot is getting bigger and is turning black. we clean and dress it and she is taking an antibiotic, but unless she gets good attention right away, we are afraid she may lose her foot. That is totally an unprofessional opinion, but that is what it looks like to me. We have a list of kids that have wounds on their legs that we treat and wrap every other day, we have kids who have ringworm, and a few we do physical therapy with. The hospital in Tamale is no help... we sent Elizabeth there on Thursday, and were told to come back on Tuesday. The good news is that we have a few doctors and nurses in Buffalo who have been helping us to diagnose and treat the kids via email. We send info and pictures and they give us their best advice on how to proceed. It is great to have that support and aid!!
********* Most "ARE YOU CRAZY????" Moment*********
One day, snakes were spotted within the wall of our compound. Since nothing is easy here, apparently, of course they were poisonous snakes!! Sister said they hide in the bush and won't come near the house, but it is a major concern because, without running water, the kids use the bush as a bathroom and it has to be safe. So, Sister had her gardeners chop down the high grasses in the bush and asked them to burn the bush outside of the wall. (that is all the background info you need for the story) On that same day, Sister asked Mary Clare and I to get the kids home early from school because there was a sickness in town and she didn't want our kids to get it. (the school, by the way, is right outside of the wall of our compound... do you know where I'm going with this??)
So, dutiful little missionaries that we are, Mary Clare and I go to the school only to find all the bush around the school on fire. !!!!????!!!!*****?????!!!! What????? ARE YOU CRAZY??? There are two year olds at that school! Who have no teachers! There are children with no sense of any danger at that school! Who probably have no teachers either! I mean, couldn't you wait till say 1pm when school is over to burn the bush??? So here we are, in the burning heat of Africa with the added burning heat of the fire, with smoke all around us trying to find all our kids and bring them home safely. Holy cow... All I can say is there must have been a fury of guardian angels bumping into each other that day trying to keep their charges safe. That is the only way no one got burned/hurt that day.
**********My DUH Moment******
I knew I was going to come to The Nazareth Home for God's Children for a year back in March. So, I've had a good 8 months to think about what I'd be doing here, to prepare for the trip, etc. However, it wasn't until I'd BEEN HERE for 2 weeks till it hit me... no more weekends!! Uh, yeah duh, Sarah... you are in the middle of Nowhere, Africa! Why did it take me so long to clue into that, and why was it such a surprise when I did?? It was such a let down, and yet, in some part of my mind I must have known this. Anyways, when it's Tuesday, and you are thinking, "man... it's gonna take forever for the weekend to get here," just think of me, here in nowhere, and how it will take 34 weeks till my next weekend. Hope that gets you through!!!
*******A Moment of Revelation********
I hope that I have grown as a person, as a caretaker, as a Catholic this past month. We have a very good priest here in the Sang Village. His name is Fr. Isadore, and he is a holy priest. I was in church one day and his homily was about God molding us, testing us in fire, building us up and helping to perfect who we are. I thought, after mass, that this is my time of molding. That God is trying to mold me into who He created me to be, and all I have to do is just let Him. It's not easy, because I have ideas of who I am, who I was created to be... except none of those were right. That person I left back in Buffalo, and who I am now is someone else. Never would I have thought I would be a missionary in Africa, but here I am. It is hard letting yourself be formed into something other than you expect, even painful. It is hard letting go of everything, until I realize, everything I need is here. Even those I love are here in my heart, and with me in prayer.
Thank you for being with me this first month, for your support and prayers. I am sure that the well of happenings will not run dry here and I will continue to write about my time here at the orphanage. Please continue to pray for us... for better medical care, for a good and constant source of water, for these abandoned children of Ghana and their caretakers. I have been keeping in my prayers all who happen upon this blog. xo
*****Funniest Thing That Happened This Month****
Sister's newest orphans are these puppies who have been abandoned by the mommy dog. It must be something in the water here, or something!! Anyways, I am, sorry to say for all you dog lovers out there, not a dog person. The puppies are cute... there are 4 black ones and 3 yellow ones. Here in Africa, they are not given names, allowed in the house, or treated like one of the family. They will be used for protection against trespassers when they are big enough. They are living on one side of the house. Well, one day I was taking the toddlers for a walk around the house. We were strolling along, and I was pointing out colors and flowers, bugs and trees, and they were repeating what I was saying. All of the sudden, we turn the corner, and you would have thought they were on fire. Screaming like I have never heard before scorched my ears and the 6 little tykes all grabbed on to my legs so tightly I couldn't move. They were afraid of the puppies. Well, here I am, with the toddlers in a state of complete and total panic, with no one around to help, and I cannot move because 12 little hands were digging into me for dear life. I couldn't even take a step for fear one of them would go toppling to the ground. So I take these little tiny steps, with my frenzied tykes in tow until we turn the corner, which took some time, let me tell you. And then... Silence... until they see the cows, then it starts all over again!!!
********Health Update********
Mary Clare and I have taken over the medical responsibilities of the house. Mary Clare is so good at treating the children. She has patience and a sweetness about her, and yet is fearless when it comes to cleaning wounds and administering meds. Ajah is doing much better. His wounds are healing. He still loves Mary and I, but when we take him into the room we use as a medical center, he cries and cries. Poor little guy! Elizabeth is not fairing as well. The hole in her foot is getting bigger and is turning black. we clean and dress it and she is taking an antibiotic, but unless she gets good attention right away, we are afraid she may lose her foot. That is totally an unprofessional opinion, but that is what it looks like to me. We have a list of kids that have wounds on their legs that we treat and wrap every other day, we have kids who have ringworm, and a few we do physical therapy with. The hospital in Tamale is no help... we sent Elizabeth there on Thursday, and were told to come back on Tuesday. The good news is that we have a few doctors and nurses in Buffalo who have been helping us to diagnose and treat the kids via email. We send info and pictures and they give us their best advice on how to proceed. It is great to have that support and aid!!
********* Most "ARE YOU CRAZY????" Moment*********
One day, snakes were spotted within the wall of our compound. Since nothing is easy here, apparently, of course they were poisonous snakes!! Sister said they hide in the bush and won't come near the house, but it is a major concern because, without running water, the kids use the bush as a bathroom and it has to be safe. So, Sister had her gardeners chop down the high grasses in the bush and asked them to burn the bush outside of the wall. (that is all the background info you need for the story) On that same day, Sister asked Mary Clare and I to get the kids home early from school because there was a sickness in town and she didn't want our kids to get it. (the school, by the way, is right outside of the wall of our compound... do you know where I'm going with this??)
So, dutiful little missionaries that we are, Mary Clare and I go to the school only to find all the bush around the school on fire. !!!!????!!!!*****?????!!!! What????? ARE YOU CRAZY??? There are two year olds at that school! Who have no teachers! There are children with no sense of any danger at that school! Who probably have no teachers either! I mean, couldn't you wait till say 1pm when school is over to burn the bush??? So here we are, in the burning heat of Africa with the added burning heat of the fire, with smoke all around us trying to find all our kids and bring them home safely. Holy cow... All I can say is there must have been a fury of guardian angels bumping into each other that day trying to keep their charges safe. That is the only way no one got burned/hurt that day.
**********My DUH Moment******
I knew I was going to come to The Nazareth Home for God's Children for a year back in March. So, I've had a good 8 months to think about what I'd be doing here, to prepare for the trip, etc. However, it wasn't until I'd BEEN HERE for 2 weeks till it hit me... no more weekends!! Uh, yeah duh, Sarah... you are in the middle of Nowhere, Africa! Why did it take me so long to clue into that, and why was it such a surprise when I did?? It was such a let down, and yet, in some part of my mind I must have known this. Anyways, when it's Tuesday, and you are thinking, "man... it's gonna take forever for the weekend to get here," just think of me, here in nowhere, and how it will take 34 weeks till my next weekend. Hope that gets you through!!!
*******A Moment of Revelation********
I hope that I have grown as a person, as a caretaker, as a Catholic this past month. We have a very good priest here in the Sang Village. His name is Fr. Isadore, and he is a holy priest. I was in church one day and his homily was about God molding us, testing us in fire, building us up and helping to perfect who we are. I thought, after mass, that this is my time of molding. That God is trying to mold me into who He created me to be, and all I have to do is just let Him. It's not easy, because I have ideas of who I am, who I was created to be... except none of those were right. That person I left back in Buffalo, and who I am now is someone else. Never would I have thought I would be a missionary in Africa, but here I am. It is hard letting yourself be formed into something other than you expect, even painful. It is hard letting go of everything, until I realize, everything I need is here. Even those I love are here in my heart, and with me in prayer.
Thank you for being with me this first month, for your support and prayers. I am sure that the well of happenings will not run dry here and I will continue to write about my time here at the orphanage. Please continue to pray for us... for better medical care, for a good and constant source of water, for these abandoned children of Ghana and their caretakers. I have been keeping in my prayers all who happen upon this blog. xo
Thursday, December 4, 2014
Prayers for Mary
About two weeks ago, a mother and father brought a baby here. The baby is two years old. Her name is Mary and she has cerebral palsy and severe brain damage. She cannot hold up her head, sit by herself or easily move her limbs. At the time they dropped her off, the father was out of control, yelling at Sister Stan that if she didn't take Mary, he would kill her(the baby). Sister immediately called the police and they arrested him. The mother stayed that night with the baby and has been here ever since.
They do not speak English, but I am told that the people in their tribe make fun of them and abuse them for keeping the baby. They are ostracized from the community and cannot go back with the baby. The father was released the next day, but didn't return to the orphanage to see his wife for about a week. I don't know where he has been. The mother wanted to leave the baby here and go, but Sister Stan wants the mother to know that they have a responsibility to this child.
Sister allowed the mother to go to the hospital with us on one of our many trips so the doctors could give a prognosis for the child. When the mother returned, she said the doctor told her there is nothing we can do for this child, she may as well just die. Of course, upon contacting the doctor, he did not say that. He said there were exercises we can do with Mary to help build up her strength so she can sit up, feed herself and hopefully walk. The doctor wants to see her once a month to keep track of her progress... and will do so for free because the parents have no way of paying for it (score 1 for the hospital)
Since being here, I have seen the mother bond with her baby. She still breast feeds Mary, although she is two years old and has lots of teeth. She sings to Mary and snuggles her, it is beautiful to see. I would like to think that being here among people who love children like Mary has had a positive affect on the mother. Sister has had the mother helping around with chores, and in return is given food and clothing for her and Mary.
The father came back this week one day, and I saw him holding and talking to his child. I thought... is this a miracle? I couldn't believe my eyes and ears. He looked so sincere and loving. Sister Stan told me he came back to get his wife. He wants to leave the baby here and run.
Tonight the father contacted the mother and told her to meet him outside the orphanage tomorrow so he can give her money. Sister thinks it is an attempt for them to run away together. She will not allow the mother to take Mary with her, because of course, the father has not changed his mind about the life of the baby. So, the mother has a decision to make. Does she stay here with her child, that from all I can see, she loves, or does she run away with her husband, abandoning Mary?
I have no idea what she will do. She must choose between her husband and her child. It is heartbreaking. Sister Stan tells me that I am too sentimental. That the mother does not love the child. She is still here only because Sister won't let her leave. That when she looks at her child, the mother just sees the thing that disrupted her life, and given the first opportunity, she will leave and not look back.
Mary Clare and I have been helping with the exercises the doctor gave us to do with Mary. It is not easy, and Mary likes to tighten up so we have a hard time getting her to move her limbs. Mary Clare discovered Mary likes music and that listening to it relaxes her enough that we can help her. She is adorable, with a big smile and a bubbling laugh. How can a mother and father turn their backs on such a love, on someone so dependent on them? It will definitely be hard work raising her. She needs constant supervision right now, with exercising three times a day, and we do not know what future medical needs she might have or if she will ever be able to do anything for herself.
Mary is a gift. And I do not know why God made her this way. I do not know what His will is for her life. But He did, and He knows, and that's enough for me. I pray with all my might that the mother has the courage and strength to love her child more than fear cultural prejudices and tribal voodoo. It is a seemingly impossible cycle to break, but maybe it will begin with Mary.
Please pray for Mary and for her parents. xo
They do not speak English, but I am told that the people in their tribe make fun of them and abuse them for keeping the baby. They are ostracized from the community and cannot go back with the baby. The father was released the next day, but didn't return to the orphanage to see his wife for about a week. I don't know where he has been. The mother wanted to leave the baby here and go, but Sister Stan wants the mother to know that they have a responsibility to this child.
Sister allowed the mother to go to the hospital with us on one of our many trips so the doctors could give a prognosis for the child. When the mother returned, she said the doctor told her there is nothing we can do for this child, she may as well just die. Of course, upon contacting the doctor, he did not say that. He said there were exercises we can do with Mary to help build up her strength so she can sit up, feed herself and hopefully walk. The doctor wants to see her once a month to keep track of her progress... and will do so for free because the parents have no way of paying for it (score 1 for the hospital)
Since being here, I have seen the mother bond with her baby. She still breast feeds Mary, although she is two years old and has lots of teeth. She sings to Mary and snuggles her, it is beautiful to see. I would like to think that being here among people who love children like Mary has had a positive affect on the mother. Sister has had the mother helping around with chores, and in return is given food and clothing for her and Mary.
The father came back this week one day, and I saw him holding and talking to his child. I thought... is this a miracle? I couldn't believe my eyes and ears. He looked so sincere and loving. Sister Stan told me he came back to get his wife. He wants to leave the baby here and run.
Tonight the father contacted the mother and told her to meet him outside the orphanage tomorrow so he can give her money. Sister thinks it is an attempt for them to run away together. She will not allow the mother to take Mary with her, because of course, the father has not changed his mind about the life of the baby. So, the mother has a decision to make. Does she stay here with her child, that from all I can see, she loves, or does she run away with her husband, abandoning Mary?
I have no idea what she will do. She must choose between her husband and her child. It is heartbreaking. Sister Stan tells me that I am too sentimental. That the mother does not love the child. She is still here only because Sister won't let her leave. That when she looks at her child, the mother just sees the thing that disrupted her life, and given the first opportunity, she will leave and not look back.
Mary Clare and I have been helping with the exercises the doctor gave us to do with Mary. It is not easy, and Mary likes to tighten up so we have a hard time getting her to move her limbs. Mary Clare discovered Mary likes music and that listening to it relaxes her enough that we can help her. She is adorable, with a big smile and a bubbling laugh. How can a mother and father turn their backs on such a love, on someone so dependent on them? It will definitely be hard work raising her. She needs constant supervision right now, with exercising three times a day, and we do not know what future medical needs she might have or if she will ever be able to do anything for herself.
Mary is a gift. And I do not know why God made her this way. I do not know what His will is for her life. But He did, and He knows, and that's enough for me. I pray with all my might that the mother has the courage and strength to love her child more than fear cultural prejudices and tribal voodoo. It is a seemingly impossible cycle to break, but maybe it will begin with Mary.
Please pray for Mary and for her parents. xo
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Faith
Often in my life I have wondered what people do who do not believe in God. Usually I feel this way when something happens to me or someone I love that threatens to cause me to give up all my hope. Be it a diagnosis for a terrible disease, the loss of a baby, the loss of a loved one or a relationship... things have happened to and around me that, without a firm faith in God and in eternal life, I wonder how anyone has the capabilities to get through these travesties on their own power. It is my faith alone that is my life preserver. I grab onto it with such ferocity, you'd think I really was drowning in the ocean. It may be a sad commentary on my faith, that I appreciate and hold onto it most in times of sorrow and trial, but there it is. I am imperfect, what can I say??
Well, since being here, especially on this trip, I have felt that way each and every day. How can anyone live in this devastating poverty and unceasing heat with constant fears of where to find water and food and daily concerns about sicknesses and health care and not believe that some day we will all be in paradise with no worries or fears. Honestly, some days it is that thought alone that enables me to continue on through one crisis and move onto the next. If you have no belief in God and His promise of eternal happiness, how can you even get up in the morning here? I have no idea.
Sister Stan is instilling in her children a firm belief in God and in having a relationship with Him through daily prayer that is inspirational. You know, the kids aren't really aware of the worries and fears we have. They just have blind faith, pardon the pun, that when they get up and go into the dining hall, there will be breakfast, and after breakfast, when they get ready for school, that there will be water for a bath, and so their day continues. Perhaps that is what Jesus meant when He said a child will lead them... that, like children, we should not worry about the incidentals. That God will provide. I do believe that, but at the same time, I cannot release the worry and fear.
What I can say is that I am so grateful for God and His promise of eternal life, for my grandparents and parents who have instilled in me the faith being passed on to these children, for the Holy Spirit who feeds me strength every day and is inspiring people all over to help here in Ghana, and in missions throughout the world.
Today in the first reading, Isiah wrote about God's promise of paradise, of fears obliterated, of tears wiped away, of lions laying down with the lambs... I am holding onto that with all my might.
xo
Well, since being here, especially on this trip, I have felt that way each and every day. How can anyone live in this devastating poverty and unceasing heat with constant fears of where to find water and food and daily concerns about sicknesses and health care and not believe that some day we will all be in paradise with no worries or fears. Honestly, some days it is that thought alone that enables me to continue on through one crisis and move onto the next. If you have no belief in God and His promise of eternal happiness, how can you even get up in the morning here? I have no idea.
Sister Stan is instilling in her children a firm belief in God and in having a relationship with Him through daily prayer that is inspirational. You know, the kids aren't really aware of the worries and fears we have. They just have blind faith, pardon the pun, that when they get up and go into the dining hall, there will be breakfast, and after breakfast, when they get ready for school, that there will be water for a bath, and so their day continues. Perhaps that is what Jesus meant when He said a child will lead them... that, like children, we should not worry about the incidentals. That God will provide. I do believe that, but at the same time, I cannot release the worry and fear.
What I can say is that I am so grateful for God and His promise of eternal life, for my grandparents and parents who have instilled in me the faith being passed on to these children, for the Holy Spirit who feeds me strength every day and is inspiring people all over to help here in Ghana, and in missions throughout the world.
Today in the first reading, Isiah wrote about God's promise of paradise, of fears obliterated, of tears wiped away, of lions laying down with the lambs... I am holding onto that with all my might.
xo
Monday, December 1, 2014
Schooling and Teaching in Northern Ghana
I have had some great teachers in my life. Teachers who really cared about the job they were doing. I have to say that through high school, I received a Catholic education, and maybe that is where the dedication came into play. However, I am friends with some teachers who teach at public schools, and they are wonderful at their jobs, so who's to say, really. I am simply grateful for all the teachers who have helped to mold me, who took the time to recognize who I was and helped me to achieve the best I could.
I have not found teachers like that in Northern Ghana. The grammar school the children attend is for pre-K and kindergarten and has 3 classrooms. I suppose there was to be another school built in Sang for the older children, but no other school was ever built. This school was a Catholic school, but because the government was witnessing the growth of these schools due to good education and discipline, the Bishop of Yendi told me, the government took over all the Catholic schools. Currently in this former Catholic preschool, there are 7 grades... in three classrooms(pre-k thru grade 5). They have few text books, paper or pencils. 4 of the classrooms are outside. I have no idea how they "teach" the children in the rainy season.
There are supposed to be 7 teachers here. 4 of them are paid by the government. Those 4 teachers are currently in Tamale, teaching at another school and being paid for working at both. The 3 other teachers are volunteers who sometimes decide not to come to teach. When Mary Clare and I stopped in for a morning, the two teachers who came in that day and the head mistress of the school were in the office talking, and the students... about 65 of them, were in the classrooms or outside left to their own devices. Yikes!
Mary Clare and I have begun teaching the children here at the orphanage. Mary Clare is a graduate of the Children of Mary Homeschooling Group in Buffalo and has been so helpful in starting our own mini homeschooling group here in Sang. The difficulty is that so many of the children are on different levels. The oldest children, 18 and 14 years old, are at a pre-k level, then some of the younger children are at about grade 3 or 4. The 4 and 5 year olds can't even sit to hear a story, and when I first started reading to them, they began repeating each word I said instead of listening. They have trouble holding pencils, do not know colors, shapes or numbers and a few don't know what the alphabet is.
I do not believe this is because the children are in the orphanage. I believe that life in Northern Ghana is extremely poor everywhere, and parents are not able to take the time to begin any kind of education, be it reading books , playing peek-a-boo, singing songs or learning rhymes, right from birth. Everywhere I look, I see parents, especially mothers, working and children off on their own or working with their moms. And unfortunately, school seems to be a place where moms can send their kids so they can get a lot of work done. That may be the case in some areas of the US too (!) but at least there is actual learning being done inside the classrooms there.
So the question is, how does this cycle end? How can the people of Northern Ghana rise up and demand proper education for their children so they can have a better life? I have no idea... The government here does not seem that interested in raising educated children, and I am not even sure the people here are aware that they are being ignored by a government that cannot provide the proper education for it's citizens and does not want anyone else to be successful at it either.
Here's what I do know. The children at The Nazareth Home for God's Children now love to be read to, they glow when they receive praise for correct answers and are eager to learn. They love the personal attention they get with the small classes we have set up and they are excited to begin class. They are learning quickly and are having fun with "old school" games like What time is it Mr. Fox and Red Light Green Light. It is a challenge to work with kids on so many different mental levels and some with physical impediments, but we are doing our best!!
I know it is not likely that the children in the US appreciate the education they receive there. I wish they could all spend a month here and see the destitution and poverty, see the lack of parental caring and that there are no extra-curricular activities here like girl and boy scouts, dancing, sewing classes or sports. There is just work and chores.
It is a cycle Sister Stan is trying to overcome, along with the practice of abandoning "imperfect, cursed" children. She is a mighty warrior for Christ and for her children.
By the way, I just had to write today that I walked into the dining hall today and it totally smelled like French fries... and I wanted some fast food so much I almost cried. If someone could please send me a cheeseburger, large fries, a coke and maybe a chocolate milkshake, I would be most grateful...
The Nazareth Home for God's Children P.O. Box YD9, Yendi, Ghana, West Africa. Thanks!!!
xoxo
I have not found teachers like that in Northern Ghana. The grammar school the children attend is for pre-K and kindergarten and has 3 classrooms. I suppose there was to be another school built in Sang for the older children, but no other school was ever built. This school was a Catholic school, but because the government was witnessing the growth of these schools due to good education and discipline, the Bishop of Yendi told me, the government took over all the Catholic schools. Currently in this former Catholic preschool, there are 7 grades... in three classrooms(pre-k thru grade 5). They have few text books, paper or pencils. 4 of the classrooms are outside. I have no idea how they "teach" the children in the rainy season.
There are supposed to be 7 teachers here. 4 of them are paid by the government. Those 4 teachers are currently in Tamale, teaching at another school and being paid for working at both. The 3 other teachers are volunteers who sometimes decide not to come to teach. When Mary Clare and I stopped in for a morning, the two teachers who came in that day and the head mistress of the school were in the office talking, and the students... about 65 of them, were in the classrooms or outside left to their own devices. Yikes!
Mary Clare and I have begun teaching the children here at the orphanage. Mary Clare is a graduate of the Children of Mary Homeschooling Group in Buffalo and has been so helpful in starting our own mini homeschooling group here in Sang. The difficulty is that so many of the children are on different levels. The oldest children, 18 and 14 years old, are at a pre-k level, then some of the younger children are at about grade 3 or 4. The 4 and 5 year olds can't even sit to hear a story, and when I first started reading to them, they began repeating each word I said instead of listening. They have trouble holding pencils, do not know colors, shapes or numbers and a few don't know what the alphabet is.
I do not believe this is because the children are in the orphanage. I believe that life in Northern Ghana is extremely poor everywhere, and parents are not able to take the time to begin any kind of education, be it reading books , playing peek-a-boo, singing songs or learning rhymes, right from birth. Everywhere I look, I see parents, especially mothers, working and children off on their own or working with their moms. And unfortunately, school seems to be a place where moms can send their kids so they can get a lot of work done. That may be the case in some areas of the US too (!) but at least there is actual learning being done inside the classrooms there.
So the question is, how does this cycle end? How can the people of Northern Ghana rise up and demand proper education for their children so they can have a better life? I have no idea... The government here does not seem that interested in raising educated children, and I am not even sure the people here are aware that they are being ignored by a government that cannot provide the proper education for it's citizens and does not want anyone else to be successful at it either.
Here's what I do know. The children at The Nazareth Home for God's Children now love to be read to, they glow when they receive praise for correct answers and are eager to learn. They love the personal attention they get with the small classes we have set up and they are excited to begin class. They are learning quickly and are having fun with "old school" games like What time is it Mr. Fox and Red Light Green Light. It is a challenge to work with kids on so many different mental levels and some with physical impediments, but we are doing our best!!
I know it is not likely that the children in the US appreciate the education they receive there. I wish they could all spend a month here and see the destitution and poverty, see the lack of parental caring and that there are no extra-curricular activities here like girl and boy scouts, dancing, sewing classes or sports. There is just work and chores.
It is a cycle Sister Stan is trying to overcome, along with the practice of abandoning "imperfect, cursed" children. She is a mighty warrior for Christ and for her children.
By the way, I just had to write today that I walked into the dining hall today and it totally smelled like French fries... and I wanted some fast food so much I almost cried. If someone could please send me a cheeseburger, large fries, a coke and maybe a chocolate milkshake, I would be most grateful...
The Nazareth Home for God's Children P.O. Box YD9, Yendi, Ghana, West Africa. Thanks!!!
xoxo
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