Introductions

There are so many people and homes that are a part of this mission.  I feel like it will take 2 months just to learn everyone's name and where they live and how they are involved with this mission.  The sisters are Sister Minerva, the superior of the order, Sister Clarissa, Sister Aileen, Sister Ethel , and Sister Michele who is a novice in the order of the Oikos Sisters.

No problem, right?  Except that there are more people around here too.  The orphaned children or those whose parents are too sick to care for them live with the sisters in their residences, Providence Home, Hindong Home and Nazareth Home.  Then the children of the poor who care cared for by Oikos are also around wherever we go.  Not only that, but the mothers of these poor children are here also to help care for the kids, to clean and cook as well.  Then the sisters have foster parents who allowed the sisters and children to live with them when they were just starting out.  They also have co-workers who are graduates of the education program giving one or two years to help Oikos and married and single Catholics who help work with the sisters.  There is an entire network of people here who aid in the care and upraising of the children.

But it doesn't stop there... part of the Oikos charism is to help all in need.  So, for example, when the sisters heard of the typhoon that destroyed the southern part of their island a few years ago, they didn't hesitate to cook a lot of food and take it down there, along with supplies and workers to help fix their boats and equipment.  Now, the sisters have friends for life there and never need to worry about food or lodging when traveling south and frequently  fresh fish and crab are sent here from their friends in the south.  And that is only one example of the larger network of Oikos friends reaching out across the Philippines.  The beautiful thing is that nothing is ever done here to see what can be gained from giving.  The sisters give without thought to cost or time.  When they see a need, they get involved.  When they get involved, their work is appreciated and to the best of the receiver's ability, the debt is repaid ten fold with whatever means they have.  It is such an organic and beautiful way to live.  And it makes sense!!!  There is so much gratitude for all the work Oikos does for the community here, and you would be surprised to see all the things these 5 little nuns can do, that people are happy to help whenever they can.

That doesn't mean there are no problems here or that the children are always angels.  This is life on earth, meaning it's definitely not paradise.  Living in a third world country and the promise to live a simple life after the example of St.Francis means the modern conveniences so readily available in the US are just not available or useable by the sisters.  They know and trust that God will provide for all of their needs and will aid them in the raising of these beautiful children.  Challenges arise and problems pop up, but for these Oikos sisters, faith in God trumps any evil or adversity that comes their way. 

I am sure that in the days and weeks to come, I will experience some of these hardships myself.  The real challenge for me will be to follow the example of the sisters and place my trust in God and know without a single doubt that He is my rock and my shield... that He is my strength and my protection.  I can see with my own eyes how God cares for the vegetation and wildlife in Borongan... it is beautiful!!  How much more will He help and care for me... for you?  xxoo

Welcome to Oikos!

I have heard from many different people of how beautiful and friendly people in the Philippines are.  I can add my testament to that as I have met so many beautiful people here, inside and out.  My first real experience to this was the night I arrived in Borongan.  Now, I arrived in Tacloban on Friday, September 4th.  I was met at the airport by all the Oikos Sisters and some of the children they care for.  One of the first things I noticed is that the children would take my hand and press the back of it to their forehead.  It is a sign of respect and a request for a blessing.  Now that I understand the custom, it is so beautiful and fills me with honor every time one of the kids do that to me.  It is funny to watch people who are older and have equal respect for each other try to take the other's hand first and bend for a blessing.  I guess the one who gets lower wins!!
When I arrived in my new hometown of Borongan on Saturday, though, I was tired from the day's journey from Tacloban, suffering from a little sensory overload and a bit tummy sick from eating days of airplane food and fast food in Tacloban... a treat for the kids who came with the sisters.  So, I was looking forward to a bed and a fan!! (It's hot, hot hot here!!!)  Well, what I got was a very warm and wonderful and loud welcome from all of the Oikos children.  The sisters care for the orphaned and poor children of Borongan.  Not all of them live with the sisters, many have homes of their own, but their families are too poor to care for them properly.  There were about 40 kids there ranging in age from 1-1/2 years old (Abby) to college aged kids.  So, first I was welcomed with hugs, then with song, then with dancing by the oldest children, then with requests for blessings.  It was really beautiful.  And the kids were doubly excited because Sister Clarissa, who has been in the US for 2 months, returned with me. 

So, there I am, overwhelmed by the awesome welcome and even more sensory overloaded when I found myself alone with the oldest kids.  It became a stare-fest.  Very awkward... So I asked a question or two, they asked a question or two... but it was very stiff and a bit uncomfortable.  Well, I'm sure you know me by now to know enough that I was wracking my travel-worn, beat up brain trying to come up with some story to break the ice and sort of win them over.  Yeah... it wasn't happening!!  So after a minute or two, a joke popped into my head.  I wasn't sure with the language barrier if they would get it, but it was simple enough, so I thought I'd give it a try.  By the way, these kids and sisters speak English pretty well.  They are teaching me their language... it's slow going and ridiculously funny to them, but I am trying!!
So on to the joke...

Knock knock... who's there... banana... banana who?
Knock knock... who's there... banana... banana who?
Knock knock... who's there... banana... banana who?
Knock knock... who's there... banana... banana who?  (By this time, they think I'm a little crazy and are looking at eachother like, "I'm supposed to think this is funny?" it's the teller's cue to move on to the punchline.)
Knock knock... who's there... orange............ orange who?  Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

---complete silence---

I was on my way to a panic attack thinking oh my... they didn't get it.... I'd have to explain it (ie...complete joke fail) ... I insulted them... It took about one excruciating minute, and then...
All at once they broke out into uproariously  loud and appreciative laughter!!!  Phew!!!  It was all too much for me, though!  Geez!!!  Anyways... the ice was broken and I wasn't the stiff, dull missionary they must have thought I was at first!!
Every morning and every time I leave or return home, I am greeted with happy smiles and shouts of Hello Atie Sarah!!!  (atie is a show of respect, similar to auntie in English) I think they may be trying to come up with a nickname for me, as all of the sisters have nicknames here.  I was told by one of the sisters that the kids were asking what they will call me.  For now it is Atie Sarah... a name I am proud to have and hope I can live up to the respect the name denotes!! xxoo

A Few Business Notes

Hello from Borongan!!  I am getting adjusted to life here and am enjoying my time so far.  I think it will only get better!!

I just wanted to note that I am able to get on the internet to publish my posts, but not on a regular basis.  However, I have been writing up a storm!  So, whenever I can, I will publish my posts, however many I end up writing.  I will just publish them en masse, so it's up to you to keep track of what you've read and what you haven't.  Sorry for the screwball posting.  If it wasn't so great here, I wouldn't have to make it so confusing!!

Thanks for your support and your prayers!  Remember to check out where I am at www.poorhouseholdofgod.org for more info or to donate.

That's it... happy reading!!

I'm Here!!

Hello from the Philippines!  I made it!! Just a quick post to let you know I am here safely.  I am currently in Tacloban which is the largest city near Borongan where I will be staying.  It is hard to believe that just a few years ago this area was completely destroyed by a typhoon.  It has been built up and restored beautifully.  Although it is obvious that it is a poor area, it is a lovely city right on the water.  I have enjoyed my time here.  I have been told that the fun is about to end!!  I should explain that the sisters have arranged for me to have a hotel room with air conditioning and a shower etc. It is nice, to be sure, and I am so grateful for their thoughtfulness, but I am looking forward to beginning my mission here.

Just a quick note... The sisters lost just about everything during the typhoon last year.  After the clean up which took a few months, they are now involved in replacing everything.  Last night we were in a shopping mall and at 6pm, the Angelus was prayed over the loudspeaker.  My jaw dropped!!!!! Amazing!!  Xo

Time for Reflection

Well, I can't say that I'm surprised to find myself at the airport with flying issues... a delayed flight.  I have grown accustomed to the ebb and flow and unexpectedness of travel, I think.  It helps that I have had great traveling partners in the past, I think.  It also helps that I have had some pretty powerful experiences this past year in forfeiting control to God.  I certainly can't make the plane get here on time...would be pretty cool if I could!

But being forced to take a time out at the airport gives me a little bit of time for reflection.  I was just on the phone with a missionary friend of mine, and she was saying how cool it was that I am going to the Philippines alone, to a place I've never been before, where I know hardly anyone and I don't know what I'll be doing.  And as I heard her say the words I've been playing around in my head but never heard out loud (you know there is a huge difference between something you hear in your head and something said out loud...it becomes real when you actually hear yourself or someone else say it...strange!!) I started a mini freak out.  It's pretty crazy, in this day and age, to skip out into the world without a ton of information.  After all, we are in the information age.  The internet and cell phones make sure we can live in a world without surprises, that we are ultra informed and therefore have a sense of security about where and how we live.  However, it is a false sense of security.  No matter how much information we have, things can and will happen way out of our control.

And after a teeny weeny frantic moment, I remembered a conversation I had with someone this morning after mass.  I said to my cool new friend that God has sent some major powerhouse praying people into my life lately.  I don't think it can be a coincidence that in the past few months I have met some of the most prayerful people I have ever known.  And over the past few days, I've heard from all of them that they are praying for me.  I think that is why I am not having a mini freak out session right now at the airport where because of my delayed flight I will probably miss my connection to Seattle so I'll spend the night in Boston where I will hopefully take the morning flight instead and hope to get me and my luggage on the flight to Manila before it leaves Seattle. 

Prayer is a major powerful thing.  No fooling.  I am extremely grateful for all the people praying for me right now and during my mission trip with the Oikos Sisters.  Extremely.  How lucky I am!! xoxo

Unexpectedly Grateful

I am so completely grateful for the past year.

 That is a sentence I never thought I'd see myself write!!  When I came home unexpectedly from Africa, I was in a torrent of emotion, most of it dark and ugly.  I was so sure that The Nazareth Home was where God wanted me to be.  Then, thrown into a left turn I never saw coming, I hardly knew what to do...think...say... people asked questions I didn't have answers to, I had expectations of myself that I just couldn't meet... I felt like I was a hamster in one of those wheels, stuck in emotional muck, trying to get anywhere else yet unable to move.  Doesn't really sound like something to be completely grateful for, does it??

And yet, over the course of this year, I was able to encounter parts of myself that I never knew existed.  With God's help, and my family's help and monumental patience, I was able to take the time to pray about and meditate on the blessings I received without even knowing I received them.  And it didn't stop with Africa.  I've had a whole year of missionary work that was nowhere near what I had planned for myself, but, gratefully I can see the movement of God all through it, leading me here to my next missionary experience.

Coming home from Africa sooner than I expected was quite a shock to my system.  Even though I knew it was the right thing to do and am very grateful to Tom and Paula Radel for their vision and courage, I was stuck in a state of immobility for a while.  But I realized over time that, in doing God's will, one has to be like a feather on the ocean...just going with the tide and not fighting for control of where one goes.  Not easy!!  But it's pretty easy to see, in hindsight of course, that offering my life to God to serve the poor and then trying to control the voyage just leads to a disaster waiting to happen!  In coming home from Africa the way I did I learned that my time and plans are not God's.  If I truly want to give my life to God, then I must be like that feather on the ocean.  Then the sharp left turns and tidal waves that get in my path do not stop me, they just give me a cool ride!!  I've learned to love where I am at the moment I'm there, wherever that may be.

In June I went to Peru to a mission in the Andes Mountains in Cuzco called The Missionary Servants of the Poor of the Third World.  I went with a group of young people on fire for serving the Lord, and each one, like myself, was searching for the life God wants for them.  There is an orphanage of abandoned children there, some very seriously handicapped, and many sisters, priests and missionary families to care for them and educate them.  It was a very prayerful trip, made memorable and infinitely more meaningful because of my fellow missionaries.  During confession, I told the priest, Fr. Mathias, that I had trouble concentrating during mass, as it was in Spanish, particularly during the homily, and during adoration, I was distracted by thoughts of everything we had to do.  He advised me to pick something in the church to meditate on during those moments. 

There is a crucifix in the chapel that is more realistic than any I have seen before.

During times of the mass I didn't understand and during Eucharistic Adoration, I would choose a wound on Our Lord and meditate on it: how did Jesus get that wound, what must have it felt like when He got it or when He fell, what could I have done in my life to cause that wound on Jesus, what can I do to make amends for inflicting that on Him.  It became the most beautiful time of prayer I have ever had and it has made me live differently now, remembering those wounds.  It was a meditation inspired by the Holy Spirit.  Throughout the mission in Peru, my other missions, in fact throughout my life, I have felt the movement of the Holy Spirit in my life.  What an amazing gift He is to us!  I am so grateful for that time with Our Lord, and for the gift of the Holy Spirit!!! 

In August, I traveled to Louisiana to an organization of lay Catholic missionaries called Family Missions Company.  FMC trains Catholic single adults and families to be missionaries, following the precepts of the Catholic Church.  They study and use The Acts of the Apostles and The Mission of the Redeemer, a beautiful encyclical written by Saint Pope JPII, to guide them.  One of the things I noticed right away about the people at FMC is that they are very charismatic.  They praise Jesus all day long, raise their hands in praise, sway and seem swept away during prayer...raised in a very prayerful but traditional Catholic family, I found the missionaries there a little intimidating.  It didn't feel natural to me to say my own prayers so freely, to add movement and so much song to my prayer.  However, I learned a great lesson from them. 

I was consumed, while in Louisiana, in worrying over whether the Philippine Embassy would issue me a visa and could hardly think of anything else.  It nearly ruined my time with FMC because I couldn't let that worry go.  The embassy had everything I could give them, so there was nothing else on my side I could do, but I held on to the problem with both hands.  As I spoke to people about it, keeping in mind that these missionaries deal with embassies and visas all the time, they had a lightness about them that I wanted to have.  By the time I left, I figured it out and was able to use it myself.  Part of me couldn't get over the fact that these missionaries praise God in EVERYTHING they do.  While in the kitchen, playing outside, working on the computer, not five minutes goes by that they are not praising God about something.  If someone asked for prayers, they didn't say "I will pray for you," instead they said let's pray right now... and they did!  At first, it seemed a little weird to me, and slightly overdone.  Then I realized why they do that... if you keep God with you throughout the day, make everyday jobs and mundane tasks prayerful, praise God in the all the small things, your relationship with God becomes super close.  And since you have such an ease in sharing with Him the small things, it is no big deal to give the big things, the difficult or painful things to Him.  You become so familiar with God that you trust Him completely and realize that if what you hope and pray for doesn't come out the way you  wanted, then He has something better for you.  A wonderful thing happens...worry leaves you totally.  I was able to release to God my worry and open myself to learning about Family Missions Company.  Since coming home, not only did I receive my visa (!!!), but I have embraced a little of their philosophy.  It makes sense to me... the people I turn to for help when I really need it are those closest to me.  It's the same with God.

And now, just a few days away from traveling to the Philippines, to a mission run by the Oikos Sisters (www.poorhouseholdofgod.org) I feel ready.  My clothes aren't packed yet, and I still need to get some bug spray, granola bars and a few other things, but my heart is ready.  God has used this year and these experiences to get me ready for this trip.  As to what lays beyond it... I don't know.  But I do know that I will be traveling alongside God, open and eager to learn more from Him.

Please keep me in your prayers!!  You will be in mine. <3 xoxo

Missionary Poem

While in this year of discernment of where I should go, or rather where God wants me to go, I have been doing a lot of thinking and praying.  The past year I have been to Ghana, Peru, Louisiana and am almost ready to go to the Philippines.  All of these places are amazing and beautiful, but the people there suffer so much.  It is hard to see them in such pain and know that just a shortish plane ride away, people are living in comfort and relative ease.

The contradiction is one that is difficult to swallow.  One time I had the opportunity to stand on the equator with one foot in the Northern Hemisphere and one in the Southern Hemisphere.  It was a cool experience.  But having one foot in the first world and one in the third world is not cool.  There is an imbalance and stark differences that make maneuvering between the two extremely painful.  And yet, I have this deep desire and clear call to do just that.  It leads me to wonder about how God can stand to reign in a world like this although He claims to love it so.  Can God love a people so much as to send His only Son to save them, only to have them live like this?  How can it be so?

One could answer that human beings have a human mind and are incapable of understanding the workings of the Almighty.  True... but it doesn't stop me from wondering.

It led me to write the following poem... a conversation between me and God.  It is written for all missionaries and all people who support missionaries by prayer and support... meaning you too!

 

 

I said

Look at all that I have... clean water, plenty of food, doctors,

family and friends

 

He chuckled and said

You're welcome...

 

But, I said

Look at them- no water, food is scarce, they are abandoned,

they are naked and uncared for.

 

Well, I love them, He said.

 

In frustration, I said

I look at all I have and I can see how much you love me.

I look at them and think there is no evidence of your love.

 

Aahhh, He said...look closer, look deeper.

 

His eyes seared mine with a burning love.

 

I can see love when I look at you, Lord, but when I look at them

all I see is suffering and pain.

It hurts me as well.  It makes me feel so mad at You,

at the world that forgot about them.

Sometimes I feel like shouting,

FINE! IF YOU WON'T TAKE CARE OF THEM, I WILL!!

 

Exactly, He said.

 

Confused, my teary eyes searched His and I said

Exactly what? 

Where is the evidence of your love?

 

He said

I love them so much, I sent them you.

 

 

 

 

Pictures from Cuzco, Peru... The Missionary Servants of the Poor of the Third World.